The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show

Science says that ASMR is the natural way to get a good night's rest. In this video, your friends on Mars will hypnotize you into Dreamworld. In the aftermath of Episode #49 ("Doom Hunt"), Emory Bunny must spend a night camping in the Wasteland. To pass the time, he decides to hone his talents as a storyteller... Will Emory impress Bimby? In addition to lulling you into rest, Emory will teach you the fundamentals of good writing: 1. Composition 2. Structure 3. Composition 4. Action 5. Plagiarism ... and perhaps he will unknowingly give voice to his own inner pain and resentment. #ASMR #SleepTherapy #GoodWriting #Literature #Rest #Meditation #Sound #Nature #Peace #Author #Calm #Remedy #Holistic #Health #Homeopathic #NewAge #Energy #Mindfulness #Coaching #Skills #Mentor #MentalHealth #Wellness #Journey #Novel #Narrative #Reading #Writing #Memoirs #Dreams #DrKellogg #DrOz #DrPhil #MasterClass #Education #English #Valencia #Pembery #Barney #Brion #CharacterDevelopment #Witchcraft This episode is canon, so there will be a test for you, later. Dive in, and spend a quality night with Emory! Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & pain. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

"Looks like everything's going to go sideways. It's gonna go REAL sideways." --Sheriff Bill The whole frickin' plot comes to a crashing halt when Monica suddenly pulls the plug on the entirety of the KAARP investigation! This is the end of everything. It's the final chapter of all that came before, and the first chapter of whatever comes next! It's the turning point for The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show---the ideal moment to begin investing in this narrative, or to turn around and walk away. (The latter option seems rather sulky and dramatic, if you're being honest with yourself.) All roads lead to here, and even Almighty God doesn't know where they'll go next! Cybernetic Super-Assassin "Plastic Risotto" has gone missing on Planet Mars, and the CIA will surely be wanting answers; Finally, filmmaker Froobius has assembled a Rough Cut of his Documentary film video TV project on the daily workings of The Cabeza Policia; Boss-lady Monica has drank too much of Bill's tasty Piss, but she still has to make very important decisions on how to proceed with all the Whatever; Sheriff Bill finds himself working against the clock, utilizes his keen intellect, and must destroy evidence while solidifying his Cabeza Policia team, then he extends an Olive Branch toward an alienated colleague; Emory Bunny heads out on a mission to the Wasteland, astride Bimby, his pet Plontiwog, and ultimately decides to toast marshmallows; Space-Byron revisits his past, embraces his detective nature, and makes amends with an Old Friend-Enemy; Kevin, Mike, Cumbot, and Pedro all embark upon a dangerous search; Loafy holds the fort at Air Command, despite his obsessive contempt for bird-houses... Not everyone will survive this story. Who can say? Maybe they will. Fate is kinda like that. One minute, you're getting your excretory orifice bleached, and the next, it's just oblivion. (Ask Tony Soprano and your grandmother.) This is the FINAL episode! Before the next episode! But it's a good one... Dip your toe in, or your nipple, or your weenie, or whatever part suits you best! Now, here come the Hashtags: #CIA #FBI #KAARP #NASA #CERN #MUFON #DCEU #MCU #Hydra #Cobra #Serbia #AndyRobot #CandyIV #Mars #Cydonia #PBS #CBC #CDC #MI5 #IMF #EthanHunt #EthanHawke #Hawk #Hawkman #Owlman #SuperHero #SheHulk #SheMale #TreeMail #SkyMail #MailMan #MaleGaze #LynxPiss #SecretAgent #Death #Destruction #SeriesFinale #NotReally #Cyborg #Alien #UFO #UAP #Rockets #SpaceShip #Tractor #CaveDiving #Drones #SearchParty #DUI #Docking #BAC #Sobriety #Frenemy #Tampon #Uterus #Period #Wellness #Meditation #Cyborg #SexRobot #CoverUp #Dustin #Neil #John #BlackOps #Camping #StringTheory #Simulation #RomanRuins #Reconciliation #Aeronautics #MollyHatchet #BCS #BB #TESB #GoodVibrations #BadFeeling #MassCasualtyEvent #PoorDriving #NoSpoilers #BillCrashes Like, Subscribe, and force a Friend to watch The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show. It's all good Karma for you. Once this show gets ONE MILLION subscribers, well... we're going to give out a FREE something-or-other. Aren't we? Free is Good. Like You, with all your banked Karma. Hit me up if you wanna do some speedballin'... I'm here until Thursday. Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

How are things in your neck of the woods? Original synopsis: Space-Byron has been invited up to Phobos Moon, the radio nexus of the solar system, to be interviewed by Barry Taylor on the "After Hours" show! Today's topic: "The everyday horrors of living on Mars!" Unfortunately, Barry Taylor has committed a sex crime, and is now on the run, and Space-Byron must step up to the plate to both host the show and interview himself... Production Assistant Tiffany Tucker slides into the guest chair... It's all fun and games until someone doesn't win $700. This is a short, breezy episode, designed to make your Saturday feel somewhat less oppressive. Unless you are Tiffany, of course. Hijinks ensue. Space-Byron's private thoughts about mammary glands, shapely feet, and welcoming bums are accidentally transmitted into the ether... This is a Liminal Space you're always free to return to, to experience again and again, and to ultimately melt into the pointless, repetitive unendingness of everything! #Radio #TV #YouTube #Netflix #AmazonPrime #NPR #CBC #PBS #BBC #BBC #Mars #Cydonia #Phobos #TrueCrime #Streaming #PikPok #SexualTension #QuietGirls #JamesWebb #BarryTaylor #TiffanyTucker #MarioFink #SpaceByron #AngryRobotHead #Horror #ThatChapter #RedShoes #MaleGaze #Patriarchy #ThoughtCrimes #Ouroboros #Ragnarok #Cydonia #VLT #FBI #CIA #KAARP #Simulation #DeadInternet #TheThinker #RustyRobotPenisStump #SafetyMeeting All Space-Byron, all the time! Slip your eager member into a supple leather shoe and enjoy the ride. Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

In the true Lysithean tongue, it's pronounced "Risottica Plastiquo"... Original synopsis: A new Player enters the Game... and Life on Mars may never be the same! Cabeza Policia may have successfully thwarted KAARP's scheme to share sensitive Martian data between Serbia and Zeta Reticuli, but now the CIA has taken a keen interest in all the Red Planet shenanigans (and in its plentiful energy resources)... A cybernetic super-spy is dispatched to Cabeza to take full control of the investigation, at any cost... Emory Bunny attempts to wriggle out of his Air Command duties; Space-Byron wants to make a new friend, then struggles with a technical issue; Loafy finally gets a job, but is forced to confront his past; Thomas Risotto embarks on a frustrating journey; Monica dicks around on the telephone; Sheriff Bill attempts to avoid an unpleasant interaction, then gets swept into a situation he cannot control... It's all coffee and bananas, as usual! #Cabeza #Cabeza #Mars #CIA #KAARP #Bionics #Alien #UFO #UAP #CERN #MUFON #FBI #Muchacho #Rage #Genetic #Mutation #ESP #Rocket #Espionage #FreeTrade #Invasion #SkyPatrol #CME #Mercury #RobertPastrami #RubberAlfredo #FreeFalling Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for Chris & parsley. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot Spoiler alert: I heard on Tweeter that Phase-3 will end with a nuclear inferno, in Episode #62. Just keep it under your hat and don't tell anyone. Ssshhh.

Sheriff Bill has called a secret meeting in order to study the retrieved Martian data that has been leaked into the broader universe... but ultimately has to come to terms with the futility of his own existence. This one's a tear-jerker. Keep a tissue at hand. Emory embarks on a deadly covert mission, buys some fruit, then receives an astronomy lesson; Space-Byron has to identify a bird; Pedro Serrano sets out in search of two important garments; Bill struggles with paperwork, then struggles with intoxication; An Angry Robot Head imparts vital trivia regarding a country music superstar... All in all, The Cabeza Policia have finally closed a troublesome chapter in their ongoing KAARP investigation, and there's a huge victory in that. Bravo, gentlemen! #Mars #CIA #Assassin #UFO #AI #Robotics #Sobriety #Melancholy #WarpSpeed #Worrmhole #KAARP #CERN #HealthyLiving #Underwear #Chickens #BigSavings #Wireless #Communication #Gossip #FirearmSafety #TheoreticalPhysics #MembersOnly #MangoSeltzer #LynxPiss Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for holes & corn. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

Well, that's Tammy Svrcek in the thumbnail, and she's an important player, and, if you check all the way back (on "The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show Web Vacuum"), you'll see that she's been there all along. Well done, everyone! This thing does have a plot, after all. Original synopsis: In the latest episode of The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show, Sheriff Bill makes an interesting purchase that will change the course of future history... Emory Bunny is determined to wrap up the KAARP investigation, and puts his foot down, firmly and squarely, but also somewhat gently; A rogue Cephalopod causes pandemonium in the streets of Cabeza; Kenny Capriccio attempts to deliver sensitive information to a hungry Robot; Space-Byron catches the cryptocurrency bug and would like to invest in ancient Neptunian fossils; Moochie polishes a pistol; Sheriff Bill is frustrated by the "upgraded" postal system, encounters a stack of paperwork, and also can't recall the name of an old friend... This episode is electrifying! #Mars #Cydonia #MassageParlor #SkyMail #BitCoin #Ethereum #Cryptocurrency #KillerRobot #Octopus #Cookie #RayGun #DeathRay #Pepsi #SmokeHouse #Pyramid #Masonry #Bribery #Espionage #KAARP #HAARP #CERN #CIA #KGB #NSA #NDA #DNA #DNR #Investing #Panspermia #Pastrami #Vending #ColaWars #CuntWars #LawAndOrder #IncredibleInsertions #LuckyFossil #MailOrder #SpecialDelivery #PepperoniForTammy #Waiting #Impatience #Kaiju #Oatmeal #Frustration #Healing #Humility #Furriness #Tesla Until next time, that's about all for this time! Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & bitch-ass prizes. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

Everything you need to know about shipping and receiving biohazardous material and weapons of mass destruction. Safety first! Sheriff Bill purchases a dangerous SPERM FOSSIL, from a mail-order magazine, in the hope that it will increase the effectiveness of the Cabeza Policia. Important Hashtags: #WHMIS #HealthAndSafety #DangerousGoods #HazardousMaterial #WMDs #Homicide #EffectiveStrategies #WorkplaceSolutions #Safety #MSDS #SexEducation #STD #IncendiaryDevices #Coyle #Death #JusticeForSanjay #Management #WorkplaceSafety #SafetyInspections #WorkersCompensation #PTSD #Solutions #TimeManagement #Payroll #Audit #Postage #Reproduction #Darwinism #JurassicPark #TeamJacob #WhatsInTheBox #MailOrder #Neil #Dustin #John #BeerVendorDudes #TastySemenOnNewEnglandBoobs #PleaseDontPutStuffInMyAss #Committees #Mars #Cabeza #Policia #HowToDoThings #MyTimeHasBeenWasted #NowImWastingYours #IndependenceDay #IShouldHaveAnotherSeltzerDrink #ThatWillBenefitMe #Score This video has been wholly endorsed by your Health & Safety Representative. Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for ejaculate & prizes. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

What are Earthlings really like? Perhaps it takes a Martian to answer such a question. In the recent Episode #44: "Podcast Situation", Sheriff Bill hosted a YouTomb Podcast inside of his mind, and some of the sequences had to be edited for time, because Sheriff Bill's mind has a limited amount of storage space. Here is the full "Hello Earth" segment, in which Sheriff Bill and Emory Bunny speculate on how Earthlings prefer to occupy themselves. The prognosis is grim! Bill believes that Earthlings are shallow and cruel, and they spend all their free time watching TV talent shows where disadvantaged contestants are humiliated by flatus-craving celebrity douchebags. He's probably not entirely wrong about that. #Mars #MarsCafe #AmericanIdol #XFactor #AmericasGotTalent #BritainsGotTalent #SomaliasGotTalent #GOT #ICanSeeYourVoice #ICanSeeYourPenis #CelebrityDanceRadar #FingerInYourMother #TheGhostApprentice #VocalSingingPeople #AssWorship #TVJudgment #EmptyMinds #TheMaskedSinger #TheMaskedArmWrestler #ABC #NBC #CBS #PrimeTime #SharkTank #AmericanMediocrity #MarriedWithCancer #My600PoundLife #My700PoundWife #90DayFiance #StepsisterStoleMyBaby #TheRealHousewivesOfFlintMichigan #AmericasFunniestHomeVideos #CelebrityAutopsy #HellsKitchen #ChimpHenson #ThePriceIsRight #MarriedAtFirstHerpes #Mountaineering #GospelHymn #LivePerformance #BringingInTheSheaves #HeidiKlum #HowieMandel #HowardStern #SimonCowell #Idiots Please text 0006 to cast your vote for your favorite performer! Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

This is Sheriff Bill's eleventh hour (and then some)! Someone knows something, and no one's really saying what it is! If you're new to all this garbage, please don't find the number "43" daunting. Dipping your toes in this show is as easy as dipping them into anything else. It's always wet, it's sometimes sticky, and, once in awhile, it smells kinda weird, but your toes will be just fine. The story flows like cool honey, and the narrative twists taste just as sweet. (There's also a strong suspicion that a Clip Show is coming, just to help you catch up on All of the Everything. Please look forward to looking forward to that.) On today's show of the cartoon show: The elusive Zoran Markovic has revealed an insidious plot device... Perhaps, a hypnotic suggestion, or psychic code, has been planted into Bill's mind, and if he digs too deeply into the K.A.A.R.P. conspiracy, his thoughts will turn against him, and his brain will re-wire itself as a bomb. Stranger things, after all, have happened on Mars. Events finally come full semi-circle in this explosive episode, as "Hombre de la Bolsa" finally spills the beans... Monica, the Minister of the Interior, is called away to a Cydonian Brothel, where two Klones are causing a ruckus, demanding refugee status on Mars, believing themselves unfairly branded as War Criminals back on Earth; Mike Fast utilizes advanced technology to track person-of-interest Kenny Capriccio through the sleazy Cabeza underworld; Emory Bunny struggles to protect a close friend from self-destruction, and wonders if a tawdry, flat stage magician may have a theatrical solution; Space-Byron considers the possibility that puppetry of the pre-frontal cortex might be the better answer; Kevin, the Analyst, wants to put one thing inside of another thing; Sheriff Bill struggles against the Wall of Secrecy that has been erected around him, and feels his kind, loving heart slowly breaking, as his nearest and dearest comrades just won't let him know what's really going on... This episode is a true nail-biter, as the clock counts down... Will Bill's brain explode, in the end? It's not likely, from a narrative standpoint, but let's just say... "Yes!" Why not? This is 16 more minutes of adrenaline-soaked Martian shenanigans that no longtime viewer could have anticipated, and you sure are the Winner for choosing to enjoy it, because we never do get our misplaced minutes back, do we? How could we? It's just not possible, according to Modern Mainstream Science (MMS). God bless you. #Mars #Cafe #CIA #NASA #Ukraine #Russia #Putin #Trump #Bomb #Terrorism #Invasion #Conspiracy #Serbia #KAARP #ME #WW3 #WW4 #Simulation #Theory #Hypnosis #RomeoTheProfile #ChimpHenson #PickleFrolic #Beer #Liquor #Party #Tourism #Danger #Cerebral #Galactic #Federation #France #Serbia #Internet #Module #Drunk #Strategy #DeadInternet #WebTrout #NumberB #Letter8 #Subterfuge #YearsForMonths #Cydonia #TaxCredits #MCU #DCEU #IRS #CRAC #Psychology #Narcissism #Gaslighting #Musician #KellyTaylor #RussellBrand #Truth #LifeSkills #TypingWords #CreatingHashtags #SayingStuff #Muttering #MSM #NSA #ESPN #NATO #OTAN #WOTAN #ODIN #NADIR #ChristopherHitchens #VagueThemes #Puppets #PuppetHarm #ComingSoon #FirstLook #SneakPeek #Trailer Did you read the MARS CAFE book? You should do that. Scroll down, not up. Check out the independent works of "Romeo The Profile" and "Chimp Henson," too! (No links are available, unfortunately.) Here's a shirt of the book that precedes the cartoon show... https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/T... Details are above, not below. Score! God is not dead! He sure drinks a lot, though. Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for wasps & pretzels.

The original synopsis for "Podcast Situation" goes like this: If you're new to The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show, or if you are confused by The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show, or even if you just need to kill 24 minutes while you wait for "90 Day Fiance" to begin, this Episode will hit your magic spot. Sheriff Bill and Emory Bunny head down to the Situation Room in order to summarize the plot of their ongoing investigation... in handy Podcast format. This is the full and unabridged program, but presented in a spectacular lo-fi format, because the PoopTube Uploader Extension is being awful today. Bill and Emory capture the streaming Internet magic of two buffoons sitting across a desk from one another and prattling on and on and on about nothing in particular... What are the Serbians trying to accomplish on Mars? Why would anyone trust the Zeta Reticulans? When will KAARP tip its hand? Where is this all leading? Who's who at the zoo? Perhaps we'll find out, eventually. #Mars #MarsCafe #UFO #Podcast #Invasion #Disclosure #NASA #CIA #NSA #DEA #KAARP #MI5 #WhistleBlower #Crime #Conspiracy #Detective #Pets #Kitten #Space #Serbia #ZetaReticulan #Matrix #Simulation #Entropy #Syntropy #Inversion #Murder #Cyborg #SexRobot #Banana #Elephant #Politics #Coma #Medicine #Spy #AirCommand #SkyPatrol #Technology #Education #Learning #Activities #Lunch #SocialMedia #Science #information #Prevention #ClimateChange #Colonoscopy #ExtremeMountaineering #TheNakedGardener #JRE #DeadInternet On the next episode: The mystery deepens! Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes. Buy THE PULP OF TAROT card deck here: https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/310614/The-Pulp-of-Tarot

Before you decide to waste your time watching the Cartoon Show, you should waste your time watching the trailer. It will give you a perfectly false sense of what not to expect from Episodes #45 to #62, and beyond. Whatever.

Why not start your Mars Journey at the halfway point? (Episodes #00 to #36 will eventually be uploaded onto an Archival/Flashback Channel, for the true masochists out there.) Meanwhile, jump in at Episode #37 and get your feet wet. It'll all make sense, eventually. Probably. Here's the original synopsis for "Damage Control": Space-Byron's simulation experiment has launched the citizens of Mars into late August of next year, and people are demanding answers! This is the most thrilling episode yet! Sheriff Bill continues to languish in his own private Purgatory, as kidney beans slowly destroy his internal organs; Monica has to face the High Council in Manjipur, to explain the massive power drain caused by the simulation, and she leaves Emory in charge of Cabeza Policia; Gerry the actor-robot climbs onto his soapbox and attempts to convince Cabeza's plebians to defund the Policia; The "Day Zero" investigation takes a turn, and Pedro Serrano is given a new task; Nurse Becky has her hands full; Dr. Pukebert is full of exposition (and sadism); Space-Byron plans a romantic getaway with two friends, while preparing to meet the press; Emory Bunny has been given Four Directives, but is fraught with crippling anxiety, and so he attempts to communicate with a dear, old friend... Mama always said Life was like a large sandwich that is technically two sandwiches... #mayhem #peril #Mars #NASA #multiverse #science #PLM #PLO #PPK #sharkweek #autopsy #Serbia #trains #documentary #fantasy #boners #criticism #protest #trucker #convoy #meditation #frontier #justice Visit my large sandwich at http://TheMars.cafe MC37 (c) 2021 Sean Simmans. Score by Kelly Taylor.

On Bumble, Tuesday is the new Saturday, and Mars is the new Saturn! In our most compelling episode yet, we uncover the secrets of the dashing rogue field agent named Tony Pepitone... a shady European assassin who infiltrated the highest levels of the red planet's Air Command agency! The madness is unfolding! Sheriff Bill is in a coma, but still manages to participate in past events, and regales his friends with clever and amusing anecdotes; Minister of the Interior Monica Berbergerber is charmed by a mysterious new co-worker, and also weighs a parcel of unexpected meat; Space-Byron struggles with an internal squirrel problem; Documentarian Froobius ponders a working title for his passion project; Moochie participates in salacious gossip regarding Emory Bunny and Mayor Veronica-5; Emory Bunny battles the inherent despair and futility of being a police officer; Tony Pepitone stalks our heroes from the shadows... You may know how it ends, but you don't know how it begins! The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show may be the only show that wastes your time more thoroughly than Alone, Mike Zeroh, and 90 Day Fiance, combined! Climb aboard this incredible sinking ship while you still can! Buy the book that precedes the show: https://www.drivethrucards.com/produc... Visit the website that precedes the book: http://TheMars.cafe Enjoy the hashtags that precede all Creation: #marscafe #justice #007 #MCU #DCEU #starwars #startrek #lunchables #wilderness #frontier #adventure #Oscars #defundthepolice #BLM #freedomconvoy #fascism #communism #tyranny #chaos #maxiverse #multiverse #yearsformonths #worldofmrgrey #CNN #STD #ACLU #NASA #crime #murder #Mystery #bingo #disco #dance #champ #RokuBumhole #ChampionChimp #RapidResponse #TinyRobotNeil #MimosaDrink MC38 (c) 2021 by Sean Simmans. Original score by Kelly Taylor.

Пиво се продаје у стакленим флашама. Када купите пиво, платићете депозит од десет центи на сваку флашу. Након што попијете пиво, можете вратити празну боцу продавцу и добити повраћај депозита. Тако је било од средњег века. Пивске флаше су направљене од стакла. Стакло се прави од древних фосила диносауруса. Постоје три врсте стакла. Смеђа, зелена и бистра, представљају примарне боје. Смеђе стакло потиче од смеђих диносауруса. Зелено стакло је од зелених диносауруса. Прозирно стакло је направљено од прозирних диносауруса. Три компоненте стаклене боце су патеена, умбриа и језгро, које је празан део у који иде пиво. Овај човек има свој сићушни пенис заглављен у смеђој боци. Древни мистични симболи су утиснути у стакло како би означили његово место порекла и вредност. Јаворов лист означава смеђе стакло из Канаде које вреди десет центи. Симбол Марса означава стакло које је марсовског порекла и које се сматра канцерогеним и не сме се користити за складиштење или послуживање пива у западним земљама првог света. Ево мало познате тајне: имам ужасан проблем са пићем. Стаклене флаше су први пут стигле у Северну Америку са капетаном Црунцхом, у седамнаест осамдесет трећој. Као ваш продавац пива, продаћу вам кутију у којој се налази десетак флаша пива. Након што потрошите све пиво, вратићете ми једанаест флаша да прикупим депозит. Шта си урадио са дванаестом флашом? Вероватно си га ставио у своје дупе. Неке врсте птица воле да се гнезде у флашама, а то је лоше за животну средину. Након што сам прихватио ваших једанаест празних флаша и платио вам један долар и десет центи, флаше се стављају на покретну траку. Робот ће изабрати једну боцу из сваке кутије за преглед. Празне боце садрже или устајале остатке пива, или опушке цигарета, или људски урин. Понекад постоји птица. Имам рак на лицу јер покушавам да уштедим новац пијући из марсовских стаклених флаша. Хвала вам што сте одвојили време да научите о враћању празних боца. Бићу срећан да наставим да будем ваш продавац пива. Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMarsCafe for cash & prizes.

If you've seen all 63 episodes, this all might make some sense. But you're still stuck at #39, and that's fine. Here's the original synopsis: Sheriff Bill's coma has ended and the elusive "Tony Pepitone"-file has finally been located! Today, the Cabeza Policia are taking no prisoners... and they have a whole new way of looking at things... As the old saying goes, "Fresh eyes, fresh file." (Whatever that means.) Sheriff Bill comes to terms with the fact that his life will forever be changed by his struggle with angry, mutinous kidneys; Cumbot deals effectively with an aggressive pimp named Ranjit; Space-Byron asserts himself in the face of a free press and a growing mob; Emory Bunny takes the lead on an important investigation, and also demonstrates that he does in fact possess a valid driver's license; Dr. Pukebert concedes that modern medicine isn't always an easy cure-all; Filmmaker Froobius struggles to find his place in Martian social circles; Moochie indulges in some typical water cooler talk; Secret agent Kenny Capriccio somehow "emerges" from a prostitute named Tammy... Wow! It's just another day of Law & Order on Planet Mars! #Mars #Cafe #Cabeza #Policia #Justice #SimulationTheory #MobMentality #MassFormation #Hookers #Murder #Serbia #UFO #LittleGrey #Documentary #Frontier #Antifa #BLM #Fascism #Tyranny #Car58 #Drama #HotPursuit #YearsForMonths #ElonMusk #NASA #KAARP #ConspiracyTheory #SafetyMeeting #RoughJustice #KennyCapriccio Enjoy yourselves! Have a good time! Be safe out there! Don't put slender objects in your mouth! Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes. MC39 (c) 2022 Simmans and blah, blah, blabber.

Everything has led to this! "We've ALWAYS dealt with the Zeta Reticulans!" The Simulation Experiment has ended, the citizens are enraged, and the Cabeza Policia are switching up their game-plan to defend against off-world threats! Sheriff Bill has taken a vow of silence, and will no longer participate in discussions, allow himself to be filmed, or communicate with anyone in any meaningful way; Monica Berbergerber returns from Manjipur with a full box of ass-kicking for her insubordinate officers, and brings a new Analyst to the team (he loves "numbers and stuff", and may prove handy in the future!); Space-Byron refuses to be reprimanded, and asserts his absolute intellectual dominance over everyone; Pedro Serrano finally arrives in Ham Village to interview the elusive Zoran Markovic; Documentarian Froobius assembles official footage for public consumption, to assuage their anxieties; Emory Bunny examines Zeta Reticulan devastation, questions the allegiance of a key team member, and declares "Code French"... All that, plus a little bit more, in this Bonus Monday Holiday Spectacular! #Mars #Cafe #War #Invasion #Live #Coverage #Investigation #UFO #UAP #Special #Report #EasternEurope #Serbia #BlackOps #Economy #Simulation #Matrix #Time #Travel #SecretTriangle #Propaganda #Blockade #Resistance #LittleGrey #Summary #Execution #Robot #Tyranny #Elvis #Revolution #Deep #State #MI5 #CIA #NASA #Metaverse #Twitter #JohnBerbergerber #rubbercock #Cumbot #ZoranMarkovic #CodeFrench Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & big frickin' prizes. "I can no longer control my genitals." More big promises, Uncle Curtis!

Past Me: "I think I'll give this character a name, but then I'll forget, later on, and call him by a different name." Future Me: "That's a great idea! I'm certain no one will ever notice." You're currently experiencing The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show in the correct viewing order! Meanwhile, what's happening in the periphery? While Space-Byron tries to explain away his little "Simulation Experiment" to the mainstream Mars press, filmmaker Froobius contemplates the meaning of his own worthless existence. Hilarity ensues as "assistant director" Joey Parcheesi finds himself caught up in a murder/suicide narrative... Fun for the whole family! This episode of "Stinky Soliloquies" takes places between epsodes #38 and #39 of The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show. Make certain you brought a friend! This "value added" video is pure interactive pleasure for you! Please express that pleasure to yourself! You deserve it! #MarsCafe #FuckOff #Istillhave #kidneystones #and #Ihateyou #all #MeToo Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & interesting prizes. I'm standing in a puddle of my own liquid excellence.

It's that special time of year on Earth when eggs and bunny-rabbits factor into the plots of our favorite cartoon shows, and "The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show" will not be an exception, even though Easter doesn't happen on the Red Planet! Sheriff Bill has read "The Art Of War" by Shin Lim, and its sequel, and he's ready to deliver a terrific beat-down on a very suspicious sex-tourist named Kenny Capriccio. It's our most festive and family-friendly foray yet! The new analyst, Kevin, is adjusting to life on Mars and his new role within the Policia Forza; Space-Byron is feeling the effects of life without social media; Monica Berbergerber has gone ballistic since being sanctioned in front of the Mars Governing Council; Kenny Capriccio is distressed to see that his personal items are being ransacked and looted; Emory Bunny spends the day getting to know a new friend; Sheriff Bill prepares a hearty meal, gives Moochie and Loafy (II) a lesson on Roman History, then heads down into the bowels of "La Tullianum" to do some physical research... Life is good. And it could be better! Please tell a friend. #Mars #War #Torture #Pain #Agony #Restraint #Exile #Annexation #Serbia #Europe #L:iveCoverage #Invasion #Liquor #Alcoholism #Support #Elvis #France #Bacon #Turnip #Chips #Simulation #Therapy #Bonding #Isolationism #Media #Technology #Maxiverse #Metaverse #Dungeon #RolePlaying #DCEU #MCU #NATO #CIA #NASA #KAARP #BDSM Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for gash & prizes. Pump me full of fresh candy, Johnny!

Is trouble brewing in paradise? Sometimes, you have to edit things. And sometimes, you say, "I shouldn't have edited it like that. I must be stupid." And then you come back and offer the corrected version as an Expanded Scene, as though it's supposed to be some sort of bonus feature. Let's dive deeper into The Mars Cafe Cartoon Show Chapter 40: "Full Disclosure" and see the full extent of the argument between the Minister of the Interior and the Sheriff of Cabeza! Who holds the power? Who will relent? Who's being a bit of a misogynist? Jump on in and enjoy this power grab/domestic dispute! #MarsCafe #Crisis #DefundThePolice #SimulationTheory #BattleOfTheSexes #PowerPlay #EmoryBunny #SpaceByron #SheriffBill #YearsForMonths #Tromso #Analysis #Film #Criticism #BonusFeature Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes.

If today is Monday, then, as Satan's favorite chanteuse, Lady Gaga, once pledged, "I'll always remember us this way..." Here's an alternate, extended, tangential look at the bone-splitting interrogation of Kenny Capriccio, down in the ancient, haunted Roman crypt that is "La Tullianum" (from Episode 41: "Rough Justice"). As always, the MARS narrative has vaguely shifted... Perspective is everything. Context, not so much. See you next Tuesday. In the April. #MarsCafe #WaterBoarding #Torture #Misery #TopTen #Telephone #ReachOut #KennyCapriccio #SheriffBill #EmoryBunny #SpaceByron #PedroSerrano #MonicaBerbergerber #GuantanamoBay #WarCrimes #Crimea #Serbia #Ukraine #EasternBloc #ZetaReticulan #AlienInvasion #KAARP #FakeNews #Disinformation #Antifa #BLM #Violence #Abuse #Gaslighting #TinyProstate #LargeUrethra #SPQR #BradleyCooper #UFO #PricklySodomy #YearsForMonths #AvocadoChoad The grass is always greener under your fat neighbor's tool shed. Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & pizzas. Please send cash. I'm being held hostage. True!

"Module 288" is Episode 42. "Episode 42" is Module 288. It is a circle. There will be no further discussion. Please feel free to discuss. Then Like and Subscribe. Then discuss. Then start at the beginning. "Module 288" is Episode 42. "Episode 42" is Module 288. "Module 288" is Episode 42. It is a circle. It is a circle. There will be no further discussion. It is a circle. Et cetera. Please feel free to discuss. http://TheMars.cafe #Online #Internet #Web #Trout #Services #Utilities #Infrastructure #Information #Algorithm #YouTube #Digital #Platform #Fiber #Optic #DialUp #Modem #WWW #WWE #WWF #WEF #Electronic #Analog #Satellite #Sputnik #Signal #Wireless #Wireful #Broadband #Microband #Quantum #Upgrade #AMFM #Shortwave #Telegraph #Ethernet #Upgrade #Fish #Facebook #Tweeter #Twit #Titter #Flitter #Flutter #Snapchat #Snapper #Rumble #Bumble #Chatterbox #Box #Twat #Mythbusters #TitMasters #NASA #ISS ##HAARP #KAARP #CERN #CERB #CIA #KGB #JohnBerbergerber #Truby #Sardine Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for catheter & prizes. Remember, DO NOT put fish in your ear!

It's the celebration of the return of the beginning of summer, after the autumn has begun, and abruptly ends, and the summer suddenly starts up again! (Thank the infernal gods that the Simulation has finally settled!) Sheriff Bill has been ordered to release Kenny Capriccio from custody, without any formal explanation, and so he gives his entire police force the rest of the day off and initiates an afternoon of liquor, tomfoolery, smoked meat, and festivities... just like in classical pagan Roman times (on Mars); Pedro Serrano has been declared a Hero for having retrieved delicate information from the elusive Zoran Markovic; Kevin, the new Analyst, seems to have a food or nut allergy; Filmmaker Froobius is tasked with grilling meat... Everyone's invited to join the party, except for the people who were explicitly not invited to join the party! Bill's there, Emory's there, Monica's there, Space-Byron's there... Even YOU'RE there! It's a bit like finally being dead... As that awful song goes, "Oooh, weee, baby, Heaven is a place on Mars!" Our friends are the adventures we met along the way. Pop open a warm one, take off your pants, and sit back... *Mask mandates are no longer in effect for watching this cartoon show. **This special episode bridges the gap between Chapter 42: "Rough Justice" and Chapter 43: "Harm Police", and is required viewing for understanding a single damned thing about any of it. #MarsCafe #LynxPiss #GrabAss #FlatMars #Barbecue #Bacchanalia #Shenanigans #Macaroni #PokerFace #SimulationTheory #Drunk #Peace #Love #June #September #Matrix #FreeTheInternet #Freeloader #Homeless #SexRobot #Maxiverse #Metaverse #Multiverse #STD #SpeedDating #Mixer #Reunion #SpecialEpisode #VerySpecialEpisode #VerySpecialEpisodeIndeed MurderSheWrote #MCU #DCEU #OrganHarvest #SoylentGreen #DeadInternet #WebTrout #TentCity #DebbieDoesDonetsk #NightShiftNurses #WifeSwap #TestTickles Based on the graphic novel “THE MARS CAFE: 300 OF THIS” by Sean Simmans. Available at https://www.drivethrucards.com/product/331143/THE-MARS-CAFE-300-OF-THIS THE MARS CAFE is (c) 2005-2024 by Sean Simmans, all rights reserved. simmans@gmail.com Original score, including INTRO, BILL'S THEME, EMORY'S THEME, and OUTRO written and performed by Kelly Taylor. Visit http://TheMars.cafe for cash & prizes. Go out and make a juicy BBQ-Friend today!