The Father Gap II

Oxytocin release (the bonding hormone) is at its highest between a father and child during play.

It is a long-embedded reward for passing down physical knowledge especially in regards to risk assessment and boundary setting.

Logically given the historic significance of the father being physical defence against threats.

We practice in one arena, to then be ready in the real world.

In today’s world, that is practicing physical to demonstrate socially.

The deprivation of this is so consequential that it changes a child’s brain, seen in working memory and impulse control.

So much so that rough-and-tumble play is recommended as therapy for children with ADHD.

It is paramount for us to compassionately investigate our anxiety (or hyper-vigilance as I prefer) in context.

We have to evaluate our original connection, not to look back and blame.

But to look forward and break the cycle.

All this and more in our September retreat: “The Other Side of Anxiety” with details in the usual place.

To your healing 💙 ,

Jas