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Go Save Her Eggs!
Wednesday Night Live 18 September 2024
In this episode, I reflect on personal challenges with subscription trends and seek feedback on my content quality. This leads to a discussion on attracting toxic individuals, revealing my own patterns in relationships and the dynamics of dysfunction. I share insights from upcoming interviews focused on philosophical inquiries and emphasize the importance of stepping back from draining relationships. We explore personal responsibility, societal pressures, and how experiences shape our understanding of risk and resilience. I express gratitude for the community's support and encourage listener engagement, reminding everyone that our choices shape our journey.
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https://peacefulparenting.com/
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The Evolution of KARENS!
"Women in power. Especially the HR Karen's hellbent in turning every organization into their personal powerplay fantasy. Not a particularly brilliant question, but I would value your insight. Your thoughts?"
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
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Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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LET PEOPLE CHOOSE!
Hi Stef, not sure if this is much of an argument but I had something I'd like your thoughts on. Some creative writing on my part combined with some skepticism inspired by one of your characters from the 'The Future', I think you might know who I'm talking about. Feel free to rebut this with some creative writing too if you find it appropriate. :)
"Do we mirror reality, and if so which parts of reality?"
"Are animals not a part of reality? And are we not more animal than object? Why then should we look towards objects as a source of direction for how we should live our lives?"
"Contradiction? Bah. Only heaven itself can afford the luxury of consistency. When put inside of a mortal body, I dare say even the sun itself would have days that it would feel like hiding its glorious light."
"To live according to logic and rationality is to try to make ourselves Gods. But we are not. We have the capacity to see a glimpse of godhood, but so long as we need to eat, sleep and reproduce, we will forever remain animals struggling against the hand of death."
"The humble farmer toils on his soil and regardless of how consistent he is in his labours, the locusts will devour that which he has sown."
"So tell me Mr Philosopher; to whom does the farmer partition for his lost crop?"
What is it about human beings that gives them the unique capacity to be sadistic? This question was inspired by my reading of “Survival I’m the killing fields”. Some the things the communists did to people is not something I can comprehend.
Hey, Stef! How do you stop ruminating over people? my family is one to sweep things under the rug a lot and certain members seem to be in a consistent cycle of failure. my mother is an enabler and complains about it but never does anything to stop it. I distance myself from my family and only occasionally visit them because it's usually a very draining experience but I do ruminate over them and I really wish they didn't live in my head. any tips?! Thank you!
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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STOP BEING CONTENT!
Divorced, remarried, I have one boy from the first marriage and two boys from the second one. After my first son was born, I managed to gradually work myself into one of these two horrible choices: catastrophic marriage or catastrophic divorce. I chose the second one out of selfishness and fear that I would replicate my parent's marriage. I denied my older son the joy of seeing his parents in love and I will forever be sorry for that.
When I had my second boy with my current wife, she became very cold and distant to the one from the first marriage, which I suppose is quite normal when having to take care of a baby.
But after all this time she still seems reluctant to fully accept my firstborn into our family when he's with us. I know that philosophy is about prevention, not cure, and I'm sure that my kids will never end up where I am right now, but any tips on how to help my family be happier would be greatly appreciated.
Oh Stefan! I would love a show on how to throw an amazing dinner party! Sounds like you're a pro at it!
Hey Stef, we have antibiotics, internet, relative peace and freedom and I most probably will not die as a drafted soldier, but I am still unable to feel gratitude and make myself happier just because my ancestors lived in incomparably worse conditions. Even if I am the 2nd wealthiest generation in the World history I tend to perceive myself as a tax slave in a luxury barn. Would you have any tips on how to practice gratitude and how to teach gratitude to my children?
How to wish well rationally?
In your presentation "Vampire Love Kills!" you describe that stating "you're lucky" means admitting helplessness to achieve goals like having a six pack through hard work at the gym. Is "Freedomain dot com slash donate" the new well wishing phrase? You keep referring to the shortness of your remaining days which is depressing.
PART 1
Thank you for answering my previous question regarding the rationality of child abuse. I’d like to continue that discussion if possible by raising a few points. First I’d like to clarify why this matters to me personally because without the context, I think we might misunderstand our intentions.
My brother recently became a parent. I tried to advocate for peaceful parenting (this was before you finished the book), and he said he trusted more in how he was raised, with corporal punishment. The typical points of “I turned out fine”, etc were raised by him. It was a lost cause, and by the end of it, he felt as though his honour was challenged by me calling it cowardly. He wanted to spar with me in a ring for 5 rounds as a way for me to prove my point (he’s older than me by 4 years and also more muscular). The only other way he’d accept my proof would be through raising my own children peacefully and seeing what kind of adults they would be. At that point course, the damage to his own children would already be done.
Long story short this was the end of our relationship. I have grieved, and I’m still in the process of accepting things, but a part of that process for me is steel manning his position. Maybe in seeing it completely destroyed I’ll have more peace of mind. As such in Part 2, I shall continue to play devils advocate. There might appear to be some level of disassociation in part 2 since there is clearly an emotional undercurrent to this discussion. A call-in might be good, but for this I prefer the slower process of contemplating and responding through argumentation. The emotions are still being processed and this sore emotional underbelly might also be why I haven’t yet read peaceful parenting.
First I think you made a few fantastic points which are worth repeating and rephrasing just to make sure I understand you.
1. “If you can’t hit any characteristic of a child, how can you hit a child?” I.e. if there is no justification for violence against someone with a single characteristic of a child, how can violence be justified when you have those characteristics in aggregate?
2. “Rationality is an abstract thing and abstract things judge abstract things. You don’t judge particular actions, you judge arguments. It’s a category error to say that reason should judge individual actions.” I.e. Reason is a standard that we use for judging the quality of abstractions. If we want to judge the quality of actions outside of practicality, we use morality.
3. “Practicality is taking the steps in order to achieve a goal. Morality is universally preferable behaviour.” I.e. something is given the quality of being ‘practical’ when it makes it likely that a given goal will be achieved. Something is given the quality of being ‘moral’ when it is universally preferred and enforceable.
With these points in mind, I have a question regarding point 3. If the act of copying yourself / reproduction is universally observed across all living organisms, does this qualify as a universally preferable behaviour? Since morality is exclusive to human beings, then does reproduction both (physically or memetically) qualify as a universally preferable behaviour since human beings show a universal preference for this?
If it is universally preferable to reproduce, with memetic reproduction as one part of this process, then child abuse can be considered a form of memetic reproduction that has a moral status because it is an enforceable subset of a universally preferable behaviour (reproduction). On the other hand, memetic and physical reproduction is goal oriented and practical. Since you made a distinction earlier between the practical and the moral, is this not a case of the two overlapping? If the two can overlap, then are we back to the point I was arguing earlier of rationality and practically overlapping, since you said that morality is a subset of reason.
The key mechanism here is to first say that reproduction is a UPB. Then to say that child abuse is a form of reproduction (memetic). Once child abuse is seen as a form of reproduction, it has moral and rational status. On the other hand, reproduction is also practical. Therefore, you have the moral/ rational intersecting with the practical.
Thank you in advance.
I am struggling with how to navigate raising children: should I participate in creating the belief that Santa Claus exist ?
I don’t have children, but actively planning to have children.
I’m leaning towards not wanting to participate in creating the belief in Santa Claus because it seems like a huge deception. When I explain to people why I don’t find it healthy for children to be deceived then I’m typically met with “oh! you have to! it’s just for fun! it’s magical! It’s Christmas! It’s part of childhood!”
My best answer would be to explain to my children that Santa Claus is not real, explain the concept, and allow them to enjoy the fictional character.
( Then , I’ll face the problem when my child tells other children that Santa Claus is fictional, future podcast question I suppose, lol)
Recently, you’ve said that Izzy is quick to identify contradictions because you’ve never asked her to believe in contradictions.
I recall the age I realized Santa Claus wasn’t real, but feared if I let anyone know then I wouldn’t be getting as many gifts. This led me to develop an ability to deceive the “giver” into “yes, I’ll believe what you want in order for me to get what I want”.
It all seems so innocent when looking at a fat jolly man dressed in a red suit.
Is Santa Claus (maybe include Easter bunny, tooth fairy, other pagan folk lore, etc) a contradiction that Izzy was never asked to believe in?
thanks!
Hello Stefan!
My first question is: How can I become a more content person?
For example, I fall into a cycle of saying, "This is going to be our forever home!" and then after a few years, I start dreaming of something bigger and better, getting excited about the prospect of moving again. I can't seem to go 3-4 years without feeling the itch to move up!
My second question is: Why am I struggling with feeling left out?
Maybe my two questions are somehow linked. Lately in my community and circle of mom/homeschooling/neighborhood friends, I've been aware of recent instances where I haven't been invited to join a dinner or gathering. Logically, I tell myself that it's okay! We live in a small town and I don't have to be invited to everything! Emotionally it still hurts though.
Thank you!
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How to Spot Scams!
In this episode, I explore investment strategies amid rising inflation, advocating for tangible assets over traditional ones like cash. I reflect on how my philosophy has influenced listeners' views on atheism and parenting.
We discuss Solana and my skepticism about its efficiency, focusing on the trade-offs between decentralization and centralization in tech. I highlight the importance of recognizing both advantages and disadvantages in all decisions and urge listeners to engage with credible sources that acknowledge inherent complexities.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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How to Help the Helpless!
"How, mental health do we help those who do not want help... The addicts, the anti social, ideally we do not create them but what do we do with the ones already broken that do not want help???"
"Are you banned from twitter, and if so is there a chance you could look at getting unbanned now that Elon owns the place?"
"What's next for you Stefan Molyneux after the peaceful parenting magnum opus? Any stones unturned?"
"Why do people prefer echo chambers so much? How can they so viciously defend ideas so fragile that they cannot question their own worldview?"
"Here’s a few:
"Make a general prediction for the country over the course of the next 20-25 years.
"how to build mental toughness and resiliency and how to manage stress and worries . How to cope with loss of a loved one, career, and/ or how to navigate life’s ups and downs in a healthy manner.
"How to raise masculine strong boys into men while also being a part time dad because discipline and guidance is a challenge with a baby momma terrorist.
"If you were single, what kind of woman would you be looking for?"
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
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Welcome to Your Biggest Betrayal!
I have written my first article in years for the amazing new Islander magazine. It's called "Losing the Language of Freedom," and it is a must-read!
You can get the magazine here:
https://lotuseaters.com/islander-2-11-09-24
QUESTIONS
"Related to your post of death by heroism.
"Is creating and nurturing life a superpower, e.g. creating families?
"I can scarcely imagine the amount of joy there is in been involved as a parent, and seeing the progression in your daughter for example.
"Why do the man-children avoid it? What is the fear?"
"Hi Stef, I'm a couple of weeks behind on your show and working on catching up! If this has been mentioned before then please skip over my question :) I heard on the lotus eaters podcast that you have contributed an article in their latest issue of the islander magazine, which had me immediately purchase it. As a UK citizen I find their podcast to be very useful in navigating the maelstrom that my country has become over the past 2 months, so I am excited to hear that my favourite guide in moral reasoning (you) is collaborating with them again. It will be a few weeks before it is printed/posted out so I was wondering if you could drop any hints about the subject of your article? If you think that it's best that I wait to find out for myself then I fully understand!"
"Apologies if it has been asked before, but I read implicit in your philosophy that God (if such an omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent being exists) has not made his approval known of any particular religion. Is the question of God and any potential source of divine revelation outside of the scope of your interest, does it seem like God has not approved of any religion or that any and all miracles are not credible, or something else entirely?
"I ask this because as a Catholic I glean divine approval of Traditional Catholicism (such as it was before John XXIII) from the miracles of Catholic saints and the eucharist (and besides that the truth of the testimony of many Catholic martyrs)."
"How can you tell the difference between a legitimate desire or need and a narcissistic impulse that demands to be satisfied? Sometimes I feel like the boundary between self-care and self-indulgence is blurry."
"I posted a lengthy question in this thread a few hours ago on my relationship struggles. But then I remembered the RTR AI and pasted my question to it and received a thorough and amazingly helpful response. I’ve deleted my question here to give others more opportunity to get theirs answered, and want to call out the RTR AI and its benefits."
"What do you think of the new YouTube policy where they will restrict/hide fitness & exercise content for teenagers because 'it can lead to negative self beliefs and body image disorders'"
"Hi Stef, I'm noticing recently on Gab and other right majority platforms a marked rise in hatred for capitalism, ultimately basing their criticisms on things that are the direct results of state action. Why is it that many right-leaning people clearly understand the social consequences of government action, but appear to dismiss it entirely when it comes to economics?"
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OnlyFans Outearns NBA?!?
Friday Night Live 13 September 2024
In this episode of Friday Night Live, I explore the shifting dynamics of modern relationships, focusing on the financial success of women on platforms like OnlyFans and the implications for traditional male roles. We discuss the decline of monogamy and its impact on sexual access, while also addressing listener questions about navigating romance within friend groups.
I highlight the significance of genuine interest in relationships, the effects of societal perceptions on attraction, and the importance of human connection, especially as we age. The conversation also touches on quirky trends in food culture, leading to broader reflections on personal philosophy. Join me for an engaging hour that delves into the complexities of relationships in today's world.
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Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Where Do I Fit in the World? Freedomain Call In
In this episode, we delve into personal experiences and struggles shared by callers. Topics include societal pressure, childhood trauma, academic challenges, cultural identity, relationships, self-image, and coping mechanisms like pornography. Callers discuss feelings of abandonment and neglect, tracing these emotions back to family dynamics and fears of rejection. We explore the impact of neglect on self-worth and offer insights on improving social skills, self-perception, and rebuilding self-worth in healthier ways.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
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Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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7
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Women and Abortion!
Wednesday Night Live 11 September 2024
In this episode, we delve into the complexities of personal relationships and societal values, focusing on parenting and autonomy. I challenge the libertarian views on freedom and property rights, exploring the implications of immigration and the welfare state. Sharing insights as a parent, I discuss guiding children through our mistakes and the emotional struggles of connecting with distant family members. The conversation also addresses autonomy in the context of societal pressures around issues like abortion. Join me for a thought-provoking look at love, responsibility, and the connections that define our lives.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
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Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Death by Entropy!
Stefan answers listener questions!
"How quickly into your first interaction with a girl can you determine how compatible you will be with each other? Is it how she receives you? Like you can make her smile and laugh and she receives you well? She has open body language and wants eye contact? Is it something that’s judged in the first interaction or something that can be felt out over time? Thank you for your time."
"Why ducks? I won't be able to sleep or consider any universal abstractions until I know!
"Here is my theory.
"Premise 1: Stef is bald.
"Premise 2: Ducks lay eggs.
"Premise 3: Bald heads look like eggs. Especially bald caucasian heads which might be spotted in old age.
"Premise 4: Women have a maternal drive to protect and bond with fragile young creatures.
"Conclusion: Stef could have chosen puppies, or kittens as pets for his daughter, but those were lacking philosophically! Why, you ask?
"Stef chose ducks so that his daughter would subconsciously transfer her maternal instincts that she developes for the eggs towards Stef, whose head when freshly shaved is reminiscent of a duck egg.
"While proposing that love is our involuntary response to virtue, Stef's secret mission is for love to be an involuntary response to egg like heads, thereby allowing him to have more persuasive power with female audiences who control sexual access. His daughter is the first test case for this before he scales it to the wider population.
"DEBUNK ME BRO!"
"How do you select employees? I'm interested in how you ensure they are moral to avoid hiring fat people to write recipes for a diet book so to speak. What level of immoral/unethical/unprofessional behaviour would lead to you firing them?"
"Can you give some examples/strategies to contradict people in public to expose their true nature/character?"
"Moral frameworks are intrinsically social because they rely on social acceptance and enforcement. When a new moral framework is conceived, it has to overthrow an existing moral framework, and if the adherents of the old framework aren't happy to be labelled as evil or lacking morally, they will fight the new framework tooth and nail. Does this mean that introducing a new moral framework requires a compromise on some issues in order for it to even have the chance of being widely adopted?
"This is like a presidential candidate compromising some of his stances on particular issues in order to be more acceptable to the public. Or as you’ve once said, ‘Are there any public philosophers who aren’t fighting one evil while appeasing another one?’ Even with the abolition of slavery, the racial discrimination continued through state power.
"I understand that philosophy is more for the future than the present. I'm just curious how a philosophical movement survives the test of time when it relies on people in order for it to get to the future. We only see the successful religions for example, but we don't see all the religions that failed to gain traction, and a part of me wonders if there is more to morality than providing a rational proof, especially since the means of transmission is social.
"I understand you haven't stopped at a rational proof either, and have applied it to many facates such parenting, relationships, psychology and history. I also struggle to consider what could be compromised on here without losing something essential about UPB and NAP which is their universality. But at the same time, I have doubts about the future success of these ideas."
"Am I a bad person if I've lost interest in maintaining a relationship with my best friend after she told me she has feelings for me?"
"What are your thoughts on the biblical story of Job? Many atheists see God being a jerk."
"Stef, in one podcast, you said that entrepreneurship is a young person's game. What would a life path look like for a male entrepreneur?"
"Twitter is ablaze because people are getting people fired who are proving for and calling for the murder of Trump."
"You've helped me understand so many giant topics of importance, economics, morality, history, logic, and so on. It's been absolutely transformational for me as I'm seeing embracing reality is paramount. It sounds silly, but it's almost as if you figured it all out. What are some other yet unknown areas of importance you are researching at the moment, if any? Do you ever feel like you've already come to the truth about everything?"
"What type of shows do you enjoy creating the most?"
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
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Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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How You Get Hurt...
Freedomain FLASH Listener Q&A Livestream 10 September 2024
In this episode, I delve into the complexities of personal relationships, highlighting a listener's struggles with anger and postpartum depression. We discuss how early experiences shape current interactions and the vital role of empathy and curiosity in overcoming defensiveness and fostering connection.
I explore the challenges of parenting with emotional wounds, emphasizing the need for supportive bonds that counteract past traumas. We also examine broader themes of self-worth and the impact of trauma on identity. My goal is to guide the listener toward emotional healing and growth, underscoring the importance of introspection and empathy for healthier family dynamics.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
See you soon!
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1.35K
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Peaceful Parenting vs Punishment!
In this episode, I explore the contrasting philosophies of authoritative and peaceful parenting, shaped by my childhood experiences within a large family. I reflect on the importance of setting clear boundaries and enforcing consequences, especially in a society that often rewards negative behaviors. Through personal anecdotes, I discuss the balance between authority and emotional connection, emphasizing the necessity of teaching children about the consequences of their actions. I advocate for nurturing open dialogue and respectful communication, highlighting the role of negotiation and understanding in parenting. Ultimately, I encourage parents to introspect on their own standards, aiming to raise emotionally intelligent and respectful children.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
See you soon!
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1.82K
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13
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Why Your Brain Gets Foggy!
In this lecture, Stefan Molyneux explores the concept of "fog" in communication, highlighting how vague responses often stem from fear of judgment and the desire to avoid conflict. He argues that precise answers signify confidence, while ambiguity reflects insecurity and a need to navigate power dynamics. Molyneux emphasizes the importance of recognizing these patterns and advocates for transparency in communication to foster healthier interactions, urging individuals to confront societal structures that encourage evasiveness.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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1.3K
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2
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Sisters for Life?!? Freedomain Call In
In this podcast episode, we explore family dynamics, discussing conflicts, health challenges, and religious influences. Speakers share personal stories on loyalty, honesty, and navigating family judgments. The importance of open communication, setting boundaries, and breaking unhealthy cycles in familial relationships is highlighted for fostering genuine connections and stronger bonds.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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1.69K
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3
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To HELL With Fairness!
In this episode, I explore the concept of unfairness and its impact on individuals. I share a story about a woman who felt sidelined at work, highlighting how perceptions of unfairness are often rooted in feelings of helplessness. I discuss how seeking external validation and control through labeling situations as unfair can lead to a cycle of resentment and entitlement. I caution against prioritizing equality of outcome over opportunity, as it can undermine meritocracy. Instead, I advocate for taking ownership of circumstances, focusing on personal growth, and cultivating resilience to navigate challenges successfully and break free from a victim mentality fixated on fairness.
GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND AUDIOBOOK!
https://peacefulparenting.com/
Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
See you soon!
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1.48K
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3
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It's Not All About YOU!
"Brothers, I need advice
"Is there an equivalent of dropping the handkerchief today as an indication of interest? I talked to boomers about approaching and they said that women used to drop thousands of hints on them until they got it. They didn’t need to learn game, the small talk, how to be charming.
"Best I got throughout these years was a few looks my way. I never knew if that was enough of an indication so I never went for it. So I’m wondering what happened to all that? Why should men do all the work of body language reading, taking the risk, learning how to flirt, being the salesman, and selling the product?
"I feel like a bitch for not taking the initiative, being a leader, and approaching despite the fear or uncertainty."
"Stef, If you go on X i'd happily subscribe there too. (or double my donation)
"Is the possible financial incentive that is there not enough?
"People might mostly be looking for entertainment, but ideas are still planted, lives still changed.
"As a philosopher, don't you just go where the people are?
"The live spaces are just another platform"
"How should a young person approach their first romantic relationship? Would it be ideal to search for someone with the goal to build a family in the near future?
"If a young man wants to spend his youth building a business till he's 35yo, what will his romantic life look like? When he's 20, a good 20yo woman will not want to wait for 15 years to start a family with him. Then who can he be in a relationship with?"
"Dear Stef, I feel a little uncomfortable maybe even a little effeminate for lack of a better word, when I say hello to a woman at a bar or a nightclub?
"What is the best way to greet a woman i am trying to ask out on a date? Is it ‘Hello’, ‘G’day’ as is sometimes used here in Australia, I generally like to use this as it sounds the most masculine, ‘How you going?’, ‘How’s your night?’ . Whilst these slight variations may seem insignificant you do know Stef that women are particularly picky about man’s choice of words in the wooing process. For example, I recently greeted a young woman at the nightclub by saying ‘Are you Anya Taylor-Joy?’. This woman responded with a face that wasn’t enthusiastic to me, it was a look of disinterest and even more than that, it’s like her face was saying ‘every second you continue to talk to me is causing me immense discomfort, even pain?’ I quickly noticed she wasn’t making direct eye contact, she was looking down. I showed her a photo of Anya Taylor-Joy on my phone and she didn’t say anything and because she looked so uncomfortable I just left quickly when I noticed how pissed of her facial expression was. This woman was doing seductive dance moves in the nightclub at the top of the nightclub next to me & downstairs too so I thought because of proximity interest signalling that she might be trying to get my attention. Anyhow Stef do you think that it was a good pick up line to compare a woman to a famous actress, especially a young & very beautiful actress? It seems more unique and more of a conversation starter than a generic ‘Hello’. I don’t believe this woman was Anya Taylor-Joy because I live in Australia and I believe Anya-Taylor Joy has a boyfriend so I don’t think she would randomly be in a nightclub in Australia. This woman looked very youthful but there was slight aging under this woman’s eyes so I believe this woman must have been in her mid 20’s to late 20’s just like Anya-Taylor Joy. I have not seen aging under the actress Anya Taylor-Joy’s eyes but maybe it’s because she gets all make-up on her in movies. This woman was probably the height of Anya Taylor-Joy too & skinny, she had an identical body like Anya Taylor-Joy and this woman was about my height & I’m almost 6 foot like you Stef, so it may have been Anya-Taylor Joy but I think probably not, she looked strikingly similiar to Anya Taylor-Joy but not identical, I think. Just to show you a photo of Anya Taylor-Joy from the movie ‘The Northman’ you know the famous photo where she is glaring at the horizon with those famous big eyes, so you know what woman I’m talking about Stef. Stef I’ve heard it’s not a good idea to compare a woman to another woman, but surely being compared to a famous actress especially Anya Taylor-Joy is an acceptable gesture maybe even a compliment to a woman, would you agree Stef? Have you ever complimented a woman you were trying to woo by complimenting her by saying she looks like a beautiful famous actress or celebrity?"
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Why You Are Rejected!
Sunday Morning Live 8 September 2024
In this episode, I delve into philosophical questions and personal reflections inspired by listener inquiries and recent events, particularly the Turpin family's true crime story. We discuss the challenges of achieving happiness amid profound wrongdoing, the implications of moral failure, and the importance of a strong moral compass in a deceptive culture.
I also reflect on the tension between personal ambition and societal expectations, sharing experiences of backlash when raising standards. Our conversation touches on evolving social norms regarding relationships and the impact on individual growth.
We conclude with insights on aging, encouraging listeners to embrace life's complexities and pursue fulfillment. Self-reflection and open dialogue on morality and human connections are central themes throughout the episode.
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History of Philosophers!
Get ready for a wild ride through the annals of thought with our side-splitting, mind-bending "History of Philosophers" series!
A bonus for ANY donation this month at https://www.freedomain.com/donate
Here's a sneak peek at what's in store:
- The Buddha's Enlightenment Express: Watch as Siddhartha Gautama seeks enlightenment, only to find it under a tree while everyone else is looking in the sky. "Middle path? More like middle of nowhere!"
- Confucius Says... What?: Confucius tries to teach harmony and virtue, but his students keep confusing his wisdom for fortune cookie messages. "Man who stand on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in."
- Zeno's Paradoxical Party: Zeno of Elea throws a party where you can never actually reach the dance floor because you always have half the distance left to go. Spoiler: No one dances, but everyone's really good at standing still.
- Socrates' Socratic Sarcasm: Socrates wanders around Athens, pretending to know nothing, just to make everyone else look foolish. "The only thing I know is that I know nothing... about your fashion sense."
- Plato's Cave Rave: Plato hosts a rave in a cave where shadows on the wall are the only entertainment. "You think this is reality? Ha! Try stepping outside, my friend."
- Aristotle's Logic Lab: Aristotle attempts to organize everything into categories, including his sandwich ingredients. "Is this bread a substance or an accident? Let's debate!"
- Augustine's Confessions of a Drama Queen: Augustine writes his confessions, but it's more like a reality TV show where he's both the star and the narrator. "Oh, the drama of my soul!"
- Anselm's Ontological Origami: Anselm tries to prove God's existence by folding a piece of paper. "If I can imagine the greatest paper airplane, it must exist, right?"
- Thomas Aquinas' Summa Theologica Showdown: Aquinas takes on every philosophical question in a rap battle format. "I'm Aquinas, here to say, I'll sum it up the Thomistic way!"
- William of Ockham's Razor Sharp Wit: Ockham shaves down complex arguments to their simplest form, often leaving his opponents bald with embarrassment. "Simplest explanation? You're wrong."
- Francis Bacon's Scientific Shenanigans: Bacon tries to revolutionize science, but his experiments keep exploding. "Knowledge is power... and sometimes very loud."
- Hobbes' Leviathan Laughs: Hobbes imagines a world where life is "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short," but it turns out he's just describing his roommate.
- Descartes' Doubtful Disco: Descartes doubts everything, including the music at the disco. "I think, therefore I dance... maybe."
- Pascal's Wager on Wheel of Fortune: Pascal bets on God's existence like it's a game show. "What do you mean, 'Bankrupt'?"
- Locke's Essay on Human Understanding: Locke tries to explain human understanding, but everyone's too busy understanding why there's no more coffee.
- Spinoza's Substance Soirée: Spinoza invites everyone to a party where everything is made of the same substance. "You, me, this table... all one big happy substance!"
- Berkeley's Idealist Ice Cream Social: Berkeley insists that ice cream only exists when perceived, leading to a lot of disappointed guests. "If a cone melts in the park and no one's around, did it ever really melt?"
- Hume's Skeptical Soirée: Hume throws a party where no one can be sure if they're actually having fun. "Is this pleasure, or just a bundle of impressions?"
And many more philosophers who'll tickle your funny bone and stretch your mind!
Join us on this philosophical journey where the only thing more profound than the thoughts is the laughter. Subscribe now to the "History of Philosophers" series, where wisdom meets whimsy, and every episode is a new adventure in absurdity!
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Be GRATEFUL!
Friday Night Live 6 September 2024
In this episode, I explore the beauty of aging as I approach my 58th birthday, emphasizing the wisdom it brings. I introduce an AI-powered call-in show for donors, encouraging interactive discussions on personal insights and philosophical debates. We navigate listener questions about dreams and self-doubt, analyzing the deeper meanings behind them.
I critique modern science fiction for distorting reality and discuss the essential roles of humor and storytelling in facing life's challenges. I advocate for cultivating gratitude, viewing it as transformative for emotional resilience. Ultimately, I stress the importance of engaging fully with life’s complexities, as every experience enriches our collective wisdom.
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THE BEST DATING ADVICE!
A deep, rousing speech from Wednesday Night Live, 4 September 2024... the best dating advice you will ever hear...
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Question My Integrity?!?
"In the last couple of weeks, you have repeatedly reiterated your stance that you don't believe in a soul or any other sort of divine essence that could be "dug out" or set free and give people the ability to change. Yet empirical evidence shows that you spend an enormous amount of time talking to people attempting to do just that — showing them the parts of themselves that have been hurt and giving them the tools to protect and nurture those parts in order to heal and improve their lives. You have also repeatedly used phrases such as "selling your soul to the devil", "soul murder", etc.
"Isn't that evidence that you actually DO believe in a soul (even if perhaps it is not immortal and can be damaged beyond repair or somehow sold for material profit) or some similar construct? Because otherwise, it would seem to imply that all of your work is merely entertainment..."
"Hi Stefan, thanks for the forum and time you give to the community, you’ve helped tremendously over the years. I’ll do my best to support more of your good works when I’m financially better able. Onwards, my question is what constitutes a genuine or acceptable apology from a parent to a child regarding verbal and physical abuse sustained during the childhood? for example hypothetically would a simple “I’m sorry” cover it? if genuine or would you see it necessary for a more detailed and context based apology? If this has been asked and answered before, feel free to skip if so, and thanks again!"
"Hi Stef, I’ve been thinking recently about the idea of living a life guided by rational and moral principles at which point the question emerges. What does it mean to be rational? I think you have done some great work on elaborating on what it means to be moral, but I still find myself unsure about rationality (perhaps due to my lack of research).
"As such here is my question. Is it rational for parents to hit their children? If rationality is seen as behaving in such a way that you make a perceived outcome more likely, are parents acting rationally in this case? If what they want is their children’s obedience, or to socialise their children to be able to fit into the world as it is, is it irrational for them to hit their children?"
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My Girlfriend LIED to Me! Freedomain Call In
Hello Stefan,
This is time-sensitive, as I likely will make a decision within a week. Here is some background:
I've been seeing a girl long distance for several months. I am physically fit, have a solid income, and work full time after completing my undergrad. We briefly met on a dating app in college and rekindled the relationship over a year later. Our relationship is long distance, so we call regularly, and I visit each month as my work schedule allows for decent time off.
We share many values and goals, and both come from similar backgrounds—our families are together, and our parents haven't divorced. We don't have political conflicts, and she agrees with me on most values. Both of us intend to have kids, and I see being a father and husband as one of the grandest honors a man can ever have.
The shared values and character traits I perceived in her made me think I had a real catch on my hands.
She recently invited me to meet her family, where I had an excellent time. They all live near each other, so I had a real trial by fire in an extended family reunion. Nonetheless, we all enjoyed each other's company, and her father particularly seemed to enjoy my company.
There is another upside to this situation: Although I am an atheist and she is a Christian, she saw past this. After the first two months, I told her about my atheism. Although unexpected, she was understanding and wanted to continue seeing me. This has been a dealbreaker for people in my past, so her acceptance was significant to me.
Now, here's where I am conflicted. When we met, she told me she was waiting for marriage. I was happy to hear this as I have been as well. It has been a serious struggle for me, but I knew I wouldn't endanger my future marriage over something temporary.
However, after last week's family meetup, she revealed that she is only NOW waiting for marriage. As recently as the beginning of this year, she had not abstained. She has a body count of 3, and in her last three relationships, she has only partially abstained, given her Protestant view of what is and isn't sex. This revelation has left me very conflicted.
I recognize the tentative nature of my situation and wonder if I might not find someone who shares all my values, especially given our age. I wonder if I am asking for too much, particularly from someone who understands my lack of religiosity.
Part of me says I'm young and have time to try again—this is what the gambler in me says and what most men I trust in my life suggest. The other part of me, which cares for her very much, doesn't want to end things. Some of the women in my life have expressed that I should forgive and forget.
Well, Stefan, do let me know what you think. Your advice is truly appreciated.
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DON'T LIVE ALONE!
In this episode of Feminology, I examine the distinctions between people-pleasing and fawning, discussing how intentions shape our relationships. Through personal anecdotes from my film industry experiences, I highlight the difference between genuine connection and manipulative flattery. I also address the implications of choosing isolation over family, advocating for the maturity that comes with marriage and parenthood. Additionally, I explore the philosophical notion of infinity as an anti-concept, and tackle listener questions on gratitude and balancing work with enjoyment. Throughout, I encourage a reflective and balanced approach to interpersonal dynamics and life’s complexities.
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Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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IT ENDS WITH US! Freedomain Movie Review
In this episode, I analyze the film "It Ends With Us," featuring Blake Lively, examining its exploration of the cycle of abuse. Despite strong performances and writing, I critique the film's lack of psychological depth. The narrative, centered on Lily's tumultuous love life with Ryle and Atlas, raises questions about her growth and the portrayal of flawed masculinity. I highlight the film's failure to explore women's complexities and its reliance on victimization tropes. However, I acknowledge a powerful moment of reflection by Lily, urging viewers to approach the film with critical awareness of its themes on love and pain. I invite listeners to share their thoughts on the film's portrayal.
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Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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2
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