39 years of wedded bliss.... how did we do it?

39 years of wedded bliss! Just kidding…

We want to share some of these things we wished we had known 40, 30 or 20 years ago:

1. The glue that keeps everything together in a relationship as well as business is….Humanity!

By that we mean that at the end of the day we're all human, trying to do our best.

Brene Brown did a famous study on shame and vulnerability.

According to Brene, shame and vulnerability is the glue that connects us as communities and families.

(http://bit.ly/2NRr5Fq is the link to her youtube)

Always give yourself permission to be authentic. You are loved for your essence.

Your spouse didn’t choose you because they want you to be perfect, sexy, funny or composed all the time.

You are uniquely lovable because of your flaws as much as your gifts.

Your kids need to see your ugly sides as much as your beautiful sides.

They need to see your tears, your fears and misgivings, your hopes, your disappointments and your heartbreaks.

That gives them permission to be human as well.

2. Dream big. The more challenging or despairingly difficult your life is, the bigger your dreams need to be.

Your dreams need to be so big that they feel completely unrealistic, like moving Mount Everest with a garden fork.

Your dreams and visions for your life need to overarch any of your circumstances, almost like a pyramid structure.

You know how the energy inside the pyramid preserves the material inside it… well, that is how your dreams preserve you in likewise manner.

When your dream or mission is much bigger than you can possibly handle yourself, the universe steps in to help you and magic starts to unfold.

You suddenly get energy from somewhere, ideas flood in and help arrives from unexpected corners.

This takes a bit of faith, but believe me, it worked for us and it will for you too.

3. Live every day as if it is your last. When you are deciding what to wear, or where to eat, or whether to call your friend or not, ask yourself what you would do if today was your last day.

4. Paradoxically, plan every day as if you have another 50 years up your sleeve.

For instance, I am 58, and I could quite realistically live till I am 95.

That means I am only halfway through my adult life.

If I am going to live another 40 years, I’d better make sure I drink enough water today, eat well, have my life enhancing supplements and take my iodine.

Every year we have a new body, so that means I still have another 40 bodies in me.

I love a glass of wine occasionally. But last year I noticed that occasionally was turning into every night, and then one glass became two.

So I decided to stop, because I plan to look after my marbles and liver as best as I can.

However, if I knew that I only had tonight to live, I would crack open a bottle of champagne right now and enjoy it with Pete and kids. See the wisdom here?

5. Never stop growing and evolving.

Every day I ask myself: what am I not seeing here… is there anything I am missing in this situation, & if I could see it, it would change/improve my life dramatically?

This is a good question for all aspects of your life, business, love-life, your health and your personal development.

Some other great questions to ask yourself every day are: How can I grow? It is natural to grow. Trees never stop growing. If they do, it’s a sign they have died on the inside.

Pete and I are actively planning to remain modern elders at work.

We want to keep working, because it fuels our passions and fills our tanks and we have so much to give and receive.

Some other questions are: what can I give?

And remind yourself everyday: what can I celebrate?

You are special and every moment you walk this earth is a special moment, whether you realise it or not.

6. Stop worrying what others think about you.

Pete and I have a ritual where we look each other in the eye and repeat the words: “I don’t give an ‘f’ what you think about me!”

We normally don’t swear, so this statement really shakes up our nervous system and the message reverberates into our cells nice and deep.

We have wasted too many years stifling each other, worrying and thinking what the other would think or how much they would or wouldn’t want us to do something so we really enjoy this newfound sense of freedom.

I am accountable to myself and I expect Peter to be the same.

7. Love yourself unconditionally first and all the rest falls into place.

Actually, the commitment to loving yourself unconditionally is the bedrock for success.

We want you to know that loving yourself unconditionally needs to be the first thing you learn and need to commit to.

For instance Pete is much easier to love and be around when he is loving himself than when he is being hard on himself....

... and the same goes for me. Fill your own tanks first.

Whatever arises for you and inside you, heal it with a homeopathic drop of self love (it is free) and watch your life take a dramatic turn for the better!