"WE ARE ALMOST DEAD!" Freedomain AMA Livestream

4 years ago
98

Philosopher Stefan Molyneux tackles the fear of death in a powerful speech and "Ask Me Anything" from Nov 13 2020.

Dear Stef:

I am looking for episodes on how to deal with my fear of death. I have listened to two of your podcasts that have touched on this subject and am hoping there are more since I believe you share similar thoughts as me on this subject and also hope to hear what gives you comfort.

Since I was a child - maybe around 8 years old - I started to have what I would call a mild panic attack at the thought of death being an eternal nothing. As a child, when thinking in the night, these thoughts would creep in. I would go wake my mum who would sit at the end of my bed until I could fall back asleep. She is slightly religious but doesn't go to church or anything, she would never really talk about heaven I think, she would comfort me by saying it won't happen or won't for a long time at least and just being there with me or telling me a story to distract me until I fell asleep. She did this for me even when I was scared in my teens, always without complaint.

My fear has never been it will happen soon, just that it will happen. I did see a counselor at maybe age 12 and again a few years later for it, but that was just me talking about the possibilities of what it will be and me not liking any of those, and still believing that it will be eternal nothing, pretty useless unfortunately.

Fast forward to now, I am 42 and have a 7 year old girl and 5 year old boy. Their questions and statements are starting now and I don't want them to have the same fear that I did if I can help it. Growing up, I have never (even to this day) had anyone close to me die; neither have my children. My fear has never been about others dying, just myself, and what it is going to be.

When my kids talk about it I have taken to saying that "it's nature" (I have found in the last year or so that when I tell myself that, I find it slightly, slightly comforting). Also I have also added to the nature statement once or twice that "it's a magical journey," that was the best I could think of to say to elaborate on the subject. I don't want to go into detail of what I believe it to be. My daughter doesn't seem to have a fear, she happily talks about when she is asleep she feels dead, I assume the feeling of nothing is what she means. My son on the other hand has said two(?) times now that he doesn't want to die or for me to die, he doesn't seem distressed (maybe a little sad). I am unsure how to handle these situations and how to offer comfort or ease, especially as they get older and more questions arise.

I have found in the last few years that listening to something with my headphones as I fall asleep to help my mind not wander, avoidance seems to be my best strategy. I do envy religious people who have comfort.

[PS]

Oh dear, haha, wouldn't you know it, half an hour after sending the email last night and saying my daughter seemed ok about it, she started talking about me and her eventually dying, poor wee thing, she wasn't upset, just a little sad.

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