THE GREAT CANADIAN JOB APPLICATION

4 hours ago
13

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Hello, everyone.

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My name is Gary Johnston, and I live in Brantford, Ontario, Canada.

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And I'm going to take you through a typical job application in the current year.

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Okay, so I went to a website called Indeed,

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And there was this ad for a housekeeper.

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It's a little bit deceiving because it's a janitor.

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It's not a house, but it is, I guess, housekeeping.

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So it's a cleaner's job at a company called Great Canadian, which is the local casino.

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And here is some of the details.

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It's asking me up front here,

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If I have human resources skills,

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and I don't know why I would need human resources skills to sweep floors and clean toilets,

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but I can imagine why.

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Yeah, it's just down the street from me.

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Vacuum hallways, cleans and dust furniture.

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Delivers housekeeping items to offices as requested.

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I don't know.

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They need some more Windex.

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cleans the offices you know a basic cleaner and education qualifications i need a

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high school diploma one years of housekeeping janitorial experience i have both of

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those the ability to successfully obtain a gaming license

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Now, why would the cleaner at the casino need a gaming license?

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Just because.

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Okay, but I guess I could get one.

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So let's click on the apply button and see what happens.

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We will allow so they can see who I'm at.

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So we're at the website, Great Canadian Entertainment, sort of.

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Oracle Cloud.

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So they're sending this job application stuff to somebody else's computer.

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That's basically what the cloud is, is somebody else's computer by Oracle.

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And it looks like Oracle is doing the work.

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But anyway, there's their logo, the Great Canadian Network.

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So here is the part-time housekeeper,

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job description,

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same thing as what we just read,

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vacuum hallways,

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ceiling vents,

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meeting rooms,

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and general public areas,

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so on and so on,

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right?

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We just went through that.

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So it's a pretty, it's decent pay.

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It's minimum wage up to, I guess, $5 over minimum.

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in Canadian funds.

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But anyway, let's click the apply now and see what happens.

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Okay.

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You don't have, you don't need to have an account.

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Good, because I don't have one.

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Now I will give them my email address.

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So they're going to

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Give me a code.

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So I will copy and paste that over.

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There you go.

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And I already started doing this.

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So some of this is already filled out.

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And it's interesting because they,

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I guess,

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um,

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cookies kept this information there because I'm starting kind of from fresh,

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but they have remembered this information on me.

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Okay.

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How did you hear about the opportunity?

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Indeed.

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Yep.

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Are you legally permitted to work in Canada?

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Yes.

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In order to work in a casino, you must be over 19.

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Yes.

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Um,

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Criminal record check?

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Yes, go ahead, check my criminal record.

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Have you ever been employed by the great Canadian gaming corporation?

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Casino.

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Nope.

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If you've been referred to by a team member, then put them there.

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What shifts are you available for?

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I just selected every one.

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Any exemptions?

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None.

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Are you willing to travel?

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I don't know why this is here for this particular job.

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It probably shouldn't be, but I put in yes just to keep me on the list.

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Are you willing to relocate?

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I say yes, but the reality is probably no.

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But anyway, I guess I'm lying there.

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But I mean, I'm just sweeping the floors.

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There's no relocation, probably no.

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You know, what are they going to do, send me to some northern casino to work there?

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I'll just say no.

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If you are a successful candidate, how much notice would I need?

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I said two weeks.

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I don't know what to put there.

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I don't really need any.

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I could start, you know, in an hour.

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But I put two weeks just to make it sort of seem all right.

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Now, here's some stuff.

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This is kind of the meat and the potatoes of why I'm making this video.

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Diversity information.

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So the great Canadian is proud of the diversity of our team and is dedicated to

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treating people fairly with respect and dignity and offering equal employment

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opportunities based upon qualifications,

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merit and performance.

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We are committed to having a diverse workforce and continuing to build an inclusive

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and acceptable environment so all team members can bring their authentic selves to work.

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This includes,

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but is not limited to persons with disabilities,

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visible minorities,

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indigenous peoples,

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and members of the 2SLGBTQ plus community.

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While the following section must be completed,

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the provision of specific information is voluntary.

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Any information you submit will be used to prepare statistical reports to develop

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programs to attract and retain a diverse workforce.

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The information will be kept confidential

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And will only be accessed by human resources.

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Human resources, the way that this stuff has gotten a foothold.

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Now, I started answering these questions.

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um so obviously they're remembering them i didn't finish the job application

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because there's no way that i would ever apply for a job at a place like this but

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anyway do you identify as indigenous or first nations yes no or prefer not to

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answer i started um answering truthfully because the answer is no here um but i

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decided to

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to kind of backtrack and change my answers to prefer not to answer because you're

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not supposed to be racist.

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That's what I was told.

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And here you're asking me what my race is.

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And by the way,

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the indigenous person slash race thing,

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that's a long involved conversation,

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but whatever.

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we encourage you to provide further details about your self-identification up above.

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Oh, so I can drill down on my Indian status, indigenous status, but whatever.

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So those who are Indians or indigenous,

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They will probably mark it down here and they will get preferential treatment.

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It's just as simple as that.

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They're gonna pick based on race.

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We all know this, but whatever, right?

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This is the world we live in now.

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This is what happens when you let commies run shot over your country.

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Do you identify as a person with a disability?

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Well, I stubbed my toe earlier today.

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Does that count?

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Yes, no, or prefer not to answer.

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And then get specific.

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We encourage you to give further details.

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Mobility, blind, deaf, coordination or dexterity.

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So are you really fat?

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Speech impairment, et cetera, et cetera.

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If you answered other, please specify or leave blank.

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Do you identify as a member of a visible minority group?

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I want to remind you that they got some basics, but they still haven't even got my resume yet.

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This is more important to them than my resume.

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Do you identify as a person of a visible minority group?

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Well, sucks to be me, I'm white.

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So I'd have to answer no to that, I guess technically.

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But I would prefer not to answer.

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I'd prefer you not to be a communist piece of shit.

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That's what I would prefer.

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But you can't help yourself.

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You're just following orders, right?

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My university college professor taught me how to be a racist piece of shit.

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Commie piece of shit.

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So I'm just doing it.

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Because I have no brain of my own.

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I'm just doing what I'm told.

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Anyway.

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So I'm not a visible minority and I guess, oh, you can be Arab, black, Chinese, Filipino.

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So you can get specific.

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Please select the option that best describes your current gender identity.

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So if you identify as a toaster,

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I guess this is where you would put that in on your job application.

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Job application for a casino.

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To sweep floors in a casino.

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Okay,

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I'm gender fluid,

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man,

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non-binary,

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trans man,

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trans woman,

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two-spirit woman,

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blah,

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blah,

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blah.

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So that's where you would put that.

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My current gender identity,

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I guess technically it would be man because there is only because I have a penis

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and there's only two genders.

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But whatever.

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And then other.

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So you can put in if you are a two slice toaster, then you can put that in there.

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So do you identify as a member of the 2SLGBTQ plus community?

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Well, the answer is, is none of your fucking goddamn business.

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And you deserve a punch in the face for even putting this on your job application.

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But then I go to jail, right?

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As long as you're following your commie little orders, you have no brain, you have no balls.

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That's obvious because of how stupid and far that this has gotten.

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Right?

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You're a dumbass.

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You've been edumacated into complete and total retardation.

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That's who you are.

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The people that are okay with any of this.

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So let's see what my positive, yes, no, or prefer not to answer.

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Isn't there some more letters that you left out there?

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Maybe an X, Y, or a Z?

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Maybe I identify as X. Whatever.

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Oh,

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and then it's so important to them who I have sex with at home to sweep the floors

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and clean the toilets at the gambling casino.

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that there's some extra details that I can elaborate.

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I'm asexual,

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bisexual,

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gay,

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lesbian,

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pansexual,

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queer,

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two-spirit,

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other,

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you know,

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and if other...

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I don't know if it'll...

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Oh,

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now they want my resume,

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which they're not going to get.

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But that is how...

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You apply for a job at the great Canadian casino in small town Canada.

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Anyway, fuck you job.

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There's no fucking goddamn way that I'm playing your stupid little games and whatever.

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Good luck with,

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and for them to think that they are the moral good guy and it's a casino,

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a casino,

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gambling addicts go there and you nurture gambling addicts.

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You prey on vulnerable gambling addicts and take their money away from them.

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But at least you're diverse.

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At least you got enough homos working there, right?

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Oh my God.

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This is the world we live in.

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It's fucking clown world.

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Anyway, peace out.

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