Candles In The Dark - Session 2 - The Goal [Larken Rose] [Part 2 of 7]

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1QZedKD7zGi5v3d1zEJ4_bbVmHdVBT8aW/view?

^ Companion Guide PDF

THE GOAL
1) Make sure you are clear, not just about your own motivations, but about what
your specific goal is in talking to the statist. What do you expect to happen during
the conversation? What do you want to have happen? What is the measure of
success for a worthwhile conversation?
2) If you’re hoping or expecting that a conversation or two will completely change
the statist’s mind on everything, that he’ll totally give up his former view of reality
and become a self-confessed anarchist, you will be disappointed.
3) Not only can it take a lot of time for a person to fundamentally change his view
of reality, but it’s important to realize that you won’t be there when this change
occurs. Minds change very slowly, when people are alone with their thoughts,
pondering what made them feel uncertain about their beliefs. And that is the best
measure of success: whether you can, by asking them questions, make them
uncertain about their authoritarian beliefs by bringing them face-to-face with the
contradictions in their own thinking. Doing that, and then letting them mull things
over on their own, at their own pace, is all you can do.
4) You cannot force a person to change his mind. You can invite people to change
their minds, and give them reasons to change their minds, but you can’t force them
to; only they can do the actual changing. Understanding this will make you less
anxious and aggressive (and probably less frustrated and annoyed), and that will in
turn make the statist less defensive.
5) Do what you can do, and then be at peace. Don’t be emotionally invested in
what they choose to do with what you gave them. They have free will. You can’t
make them think or understanding anything.
6) The measure of success, the indications that the statist has seen the
contradictions inside his own head, can come in very different forms: everything
from the statist calmly saying, “I’m not sure; I will have to think more about that,”
to the statist getting emotional and angry in response to your calm, polite
questions. Both of those reactions—and a lot of in between responses—are signs
that the statist feels cognitive dissonance, where his own internal contradictions are
making him feel uncomfortable. Regardless of how such cognitive dissonance
manifests, it is always a good sign.
7) Making the statist see his own contradictions is about all you can do, and all you
need to do. If you accomplish that, regardless of how he chose to react when it
happened, then the discussion was a success.
8) Once a person has seen his own contradictions, getting angry at you or running
away won’t fix his problem. He’ll be taking the contradictions with him when he
goes. And in many cases, they’ll keep nagging at him until he thinks about them
and tries to sort them out in his own mind. Again, that is where most of the
progress will occur; not when he is talking to you.
9) Once the statist indicates that he has seen a contradiction in his own mind—
whether he shows that in a calm, rational manner, or by getting downright
irrational and hostile—it is usually best to back off and leave him to deal with it
himself. If he clearly wants the conversation to continue, then go ahead. But do not
push harder after he sees the conflict inside his own head, or he will likely just get
defensive and combative, and “double down” on his unreasonable, self-
contradictory position.
10) Do not be surprised if you need to gently guide the statist to seeing the same
contradiction more than once, or even several times, before he fixes it. When a lie
has had decades to sink in, it can take time and effort to thoroughly root it out.