Absolute Synchrony Delusion: Narcissistic Expectation of Total Understanding and Obedience

Absolute Synchrony Delusion: Narcissistic Expectation of Total Understanding and Obedience

This CONCEPT describes a psychological pattern commonly observed in individuals with narcissistic tendencies. They develop an unrealistic belief that those they have emotionally invested in—whether people or pets—should fully align with their thoughts, feelings, and worldview to the point of complete synchronicity. They expect absolute understanding, unwavering loyalty, and total obedience, interpreting these as natural extensions of their own self-worth. When their expectations are not met, they perceive the other party as dismissive or disinterested, positioning themselves as victims of neglect or disrespect, even though their expectations are inherently unrealistic.

Key traits include:

Expectation of Absolute Unity: Believing that their chosen companions should fully align with their thoughts and emotions without question.

Victim Mentality: Viewing themselves as wronged or ignored if the other party demonstrates independence or fails to meet their expectations.

Emotional Contradiction: Simultaneously demanding unquestioning loyalty while feeling rejected when it is not reciprocated.

Control and Dependency: Seeking validation and a sense of power through the perceived "oneness" with the other, but becoming emotionally destabilized when this is challenged.

From a DSM-5 perspective, this behavior aligns with traits of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), particularly grandiosity, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. It also reflects cognitive distortions such as personalization (assuming others' actions are always about them) and emotional reasoning (believing feelings of rejection equate to actual neglect).

If left unaddressed, this pattern can lead to strained relationships, emotional volatility, and isolation. Therapy can help individuals explore their unrealistic expectations, develop empathy, and build healthier interpersonal boundaries.

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