Real Men in Black

The Men in Black dress in dark suits and claim to be government agents. They threaten the witnesses of UFOs, and may be aliens themselves.

A sighting of a UFO was investigated in 1947 by the FBI in the state of Washington. A harbor patrolman on Puget Sound reported over Maury Island six objects in the sky, shaped like doughnuts. The boat commanded by Harold Dahl was pelted with a substance resembling lava, or white hot metal, injuring two... a crew member and his dog. Before its investigation ended the Bureau would also be looking into the first appearance of the Men in Black.

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The morning after the sighting Harold Dahl was visited by a stranger wearing a black suit who offered to buy him breakfast. They drove to a restaurant. Dahl was in his own car. The other man was driving a black, shiny Buick. At the restaurant the man in black did not ask for Harold's story. Instead he told Harold what his story would be. If he told anyone what really happened, neither he nor his family would be safe, the shady man assured him.

Today men dressed in black suits who claim to be government agents, continue to harass and threaten the witnesses to UFO's, to keep them from talking about what they have seen. The Men in Black may be aliens themselves.

Niagara Falls is shared by two countries. Facing eachother from opposite sides of the Niagara are two cities, both of whose economies are built on tourism. One is in the U.S. The other is in Canada. On the Canadian side of the Falls one night in 2008 at a Sheraton hotel, the hotel manager and several employees witnessed a dark, triangular craft. It was flying silently and slowly over the Niagara River, heading in the direction of the hotel. The UFO emitted a beam of white light, illuminating the water below. Suddenly the etheral searchlight swung up. The beam was trained upon the witnesses, momentarily pinning them like insects in a specimen case, before they broke free and fled in panic.

Exactly seven months later two Men in Black were caught on surveillance video, in the lobby of the Sheraton. They were dressed identically in black hats and black trench coats. Their facial features were also the same. They questioned the hotel bellman and a woman working as a chambermaid. The woman remembered they had no eyebrows... no facial hair of any kind. Their eyes were oddly large and blue, and they never blinked an eyelid, not even once.

The Men in Black are known to have conducted experiments upon humans. The most popular computer games in 1981 were still confined to brightly painted arcade game cabinets, for which one paid a quarter for a single play. A new game by the name of Polybius appeared at several arcades in Portland, Oregon. It was a digital acid trip, and it was popular to the point of addiction. Lines formed to use the machines. Fights would break out over who would get to play next. Polybius was copyrighted by Sinnesloeschen, a company name that translates from the German, as "sensory wipe".

Soon the avid players contracted a variety of unpleasant side effects including photosensitive epilepsy, motion sickness, and vertigo. Hallucinations were reported as well as amnesia. The owners of the arcades did start complaining to the distributor of the game, when Men in Black began showing up on a weekly basis, taking down the names of those holding the high scores on Polybius, and opening the cabinet to access recorded data. The game was using raster graphics to send subliminal messages to the players, who became the unwitting subjects of an otherworldly experiment. After four weeks of data collection, more men in black suits arrived with hand carts and removed all the machines.

The Men in Black are also assassins. They have been terminating with extreme prejudice the most eminent UFO researchers in the world. In 2016 they eliminated Max Spiers, the paranormal whistleblower who was part of a secret government project to produce a "super soldier".

Even as early as 1947, the year it all began, there was an attempt on the life of the pilot and UFO witness, Kenneth Arnold. After being forced to make an emergency landing he examined his CallAir mountain plane. He discovered the fuel valve had been switched off.

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