Alan Lichtman's Wig Wants a Divorce

It's pretty sad. Alan Lichtman and his poorly fitting wig have been together for years. However, in the wake of the 2024 election when Lichtman's 13 Keys to the Presidency was revealed as completely absurd, he had been acting like such a maniac that now his wig is demanding a divorce. The poor wig can no longer tolerate the embarrassment.