clang gang all day *plz forgive the sound

look at all that crap in the backseat
do you see this, we are being weird right now
put yer headlights on, amy
i did exceptionally well @ the east room tonight
i can't believe that i numbered my jokes (soooo not like me)
doin the same shit on stage all the time is lame
i think i get how other people do standup now, i've watched em do it enough
the funniest thing about eating on stage is that it's not a punchline, i just do it
i coulda just waited to shoot until it was less bumpy but alas
i dunno why i think i have to torture myself
what exactly is in it for me to feel this way about it, i wonder
learned helpfulness is better than the alternative
i really am lucky no matter how it feels
all that women have are our feelings
doing things when i'm supposed to be doing other things
i have to stretch my pinky in order to play that
the man in my head yells at me for swerving
i can't replicate this if i tried
you don't have to believe me, i know that God sees me cos God is in me
if only a muslim had been in the audience when i ate that bacon, would i have gotten killed
muslims can't take a joke n neither can most americans
this camcorder is a they, apparently
if everyone could be better at anything it'd be taking a joke
if comics could be better at anything it'd be making a joke
no jokes about buttholes tonight but i did remind them w/ my sodomy joke
i never write personal jokes about anyone, i do caricature jokes cos personal jokes are petty as fuck (very female)
nobody knows what men OR women are
i am playing too fast
my bad, thelonious (car)
porn addiction is due to loneliness
the saddest chords, j/k i'll find sadder ones
i can't seem to talk right now, i'm trippin (not actually)
doin comedy on stage makes you understand time in a completely different way
i live to impress the man in my head
mince is to cut into small pieces so does that count?
maybe i'll end up bringin up...
it's painful til i figure out why
it's not so shameful to be hurt or sad or whatever society thinks is bad
unfortunately you got the freedom to self-destruct
sorry if you are sick of this but i can't help what i care about
what clout would i get for this anyway
everyone's a zombie now, what do we do
you're supposed to learn sumin on drugs
speaking of drugs...josh lewis had a bad drug experience recently
appalachia is a very sweet southern accent
i sit next to josh at practically every mic
i work on my jokes n posters during other peoples' sets
everyone did fairly well tonight
bias makes people boring
i keep forgetting the world i live in, that's how much i live in mine
what yawl consider to be life hahahaha
snl is ungodly liberal n fuck lorne michaels anyway
of course they were all female names
i guess i just took their joke n ran a marathon w/ it
i think it was pessimistic pamela actually
i keep trying to warn people about how strong the weed is now...
eventually they will have no choice but to listen to the one deemed crazy
i promise i am way more annoyed w/ myself than you think you are hahaha
i had 8 min at that comedy show so that's why i brought the keyboard up
i hate it when they talk me up
confusion is a good thing for a comic
i strike all the chords
it's a quadfecta i reckon
artists can make up words, so can schizos
a diagnosis doesn't have to be devastating or a death sentence
you can just learn how to make due