Hey Hollywood: Making A Mockery Of Catholicism Is Neither Original Nor Edgy Anymore

Posted • October 7, 2024: In a world where it has become taboo to insult most religions and 'colonization' -- forcing the beliefs of the dominant culture on another -- is an unforgivable sin, there are a few exceptions. Catholicism is chief among them. It's okay to insult Catholicism and force the social mores and beliefs of dominant culture on Catholicism because it's just so backwards and we have to bring it into the 21st Century. Even the current head of the Catholic Church, Pope Francis, has little use for the traditionalists that are filling up the pews, populating the religious orders, and making more Catholic babies than their 'modern' counterparts. I will admit it has been a hot minute since Hollywood decided to go back to the 'trash Catholicism' well for content. But given the state of what Hollywood is producing these days, perhaps they're hoping a rehash of something straight out of the Dan Brown School of Theology will be a box office hit.

Ben Shapiro recently did a spoiler-laden review of 'Conclave', a drama directed by Edward Berger set to hit theaters October 25. It has an all-star cast: Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci, John Lithgow, and Isabella Rossellini. He's warning Catholics that the movie should make them mad. I won't speak for all Catholics, but for me, it does not make me mad. Just bored. (Heads up: In this next paragraph I will spoil the twist, so if you don't want it ruined, stop reading.)

If you are not Catholic, Ben does a good job explaining what the Conclave is. If you didn't listen to the video, it's the procedure by which the Cardinals select a new pope using secret ballots and some back-room politicking. It could make for an interesting movie, because the vast majority of people (including Catholics) never get to see what goes on. We just watch for the smoke from St. Peter's. A Cardinal, lately appointed by the deceased pope, is selected as the leader of the Catholic Church. The twist is that this pope is a biological female. Ooooh. A female (trans?) pope! Take that, Catholics! How original! How edgy! Not.

We get it, Hollywood. Catholicism is old and outdated and that hurts your feelings. It would be so much better if it did away with its teachings on abortion and gay marriage and the all-male priesthood and became indistinguishable from denominations that offer little more than morally therapeutic deism. I'll concede the cast is stellar, and perhaps the performances, cinematography, and other production values make a good film from a technical aspect. I see it's received 94% positive critic reviews on Rotten Tomatoes and sits at 7.5/10 on IMDb (with 280 reviews). Despite the Academy's rules on diversity for Best Picture nominees, I have no doubt several of the cast will get nominated, and the film will be nominated for Best Picture.

And if they had stuck to telling a good story about an admittedly mysterious, infrequent event -- the election of a pope -- it might have been something I saw in the theatre, and something worthy of the nominations it wil garner. All of that is, however, undone by the political twist. Perhaps 20 years ago this would have been controversial and upsetting. Today, all it elicits from me is a yawn and a shrug.