HOW TO GET OVER YOUR EX - Shan BOODY

HOW TO GET OVER YOUR EX - Shan BOODY
A LOT of people have messaged me about going through a breakup recently so I decided to break down two ways to deal with heartache this week. Which is the better advice? Head or heart?

Head vs Heart is a web series where sex expert Shannon gives your questions two diferent answers and the viewers vote on which answer is the better advice. Be sure to leave a comment below with your take.

This week's question:
Desiree writes
Hey Shannon! My boyfriend of 3 years and I just broke up. This was my first real love. If you could offer one piece of advice, how do I get through this because I feel really lost right now. We ended things mutually and it was a smart decision to make but how can I move forward without the memories haunting me? Should I keep in touch with him?

Full article on why women heal from heartbreaks better than men
https://www.yahoo.com/health/why-men-...

If YOU have a question about sex/ love of your own LEAVE A COMMENT IN THE COMMENT SECTION. Make sure it is a single question designed for a YES or NO answer. For example: should I tell my partner I am not sexually satisfied and have been faking orgasms?

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Music In this Video: "Working It" YouTube library

Transcript:
Ha: You sound like you have some things to work through so why don’t I go first. The divorce of Chris Martin and Gweneth Paltrow gave the world a beautiful title for a pretty tricky but ultimately ideal concept - conscious uncoupling. Conscious uncoupling is where two people who fell in love together, walk as a team out of their relationship the same way they came in. Conscious uncoupling is still a partnership – one where you both lean on one another for support, closure and guidance. Who better to coach you through heartbreak then the one who knows your heart best? Like you said Desiree, both of you recognize that breaking up is the best decision. Now both of you can also work together on making sure it’s a healthy, and relatively painless process.
He: That sounds all well in good but meanwhile on planet earth, shit doesn’t quite work that way. Love is not your friend Desiree. Love kept the two of you in a relationship that the both of you knew wasn’t right. But that’s love’s job, to chemically bind two mates together for long enough so they can technically have then bring an infant into maturity. Love is a combination of dopamine, oxytocin, vasopressin and serotonin. Love is simply a neuro-chemical addiction it does not have a sound mind, as a matter of fact it doesn’t even have a mind – so don’t listen to it. Listen to your head. Your head knows the truth, your head sees the full picture. If you truly know that relationship needs to be over, don’t turn back.
Ha: To insinuate that the world’s most powerful feeling is nothing more than science is to ignore the very magic that makes life worth living. You have to be true to how you feel, denying yourself, faking yourself and forcing yourself will not allow you to completely heal. University College London found that women experience far more anguish after a breakup but it takes men longer to recover. This can be attributed to the fact that women still seek closure and spend more time trying to understand why their relationship failed before brushing it under the rug and moving on to the next without deep examination. I’m not saying lean back into a failed relationship but yes if you feel like you have something to say to that person- say it! And keep saying whatever “it” is until there is nothing left to say but I love you, have a nice life.
He: Listen to me you can’t talk to this person at all. You can’t talk to this person anymore than a crack fiend can’t simply take one more hit before getting clean. Love is an addiction; it exists in the reward-centre of the brain – the same place that is hyper-activated when people are on heroine. If you keep feeding your addiction you will never be free from it, ask anyone at ANON. The thing that makes you sick will not make you better. The person who has ripped your heart out cannot complete your soul. Our own body can be our worst enemy. It’s not destiny that is keeping you bound to this person it’s biology so pull it to-fucking-gether cry in private and keep moving on with your awesome life

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