The Devil Supports Democratic Policy

4 months ago
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📢 𝐑𝐮𝐛𝐞𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐂𝐮𝐛𝐚𝐧 𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 📢

🔊 BREAKING NEWS: The Devil Endorses Democrats! 🔊

The Devil has officially thrown his pitchfork into the ring for the Democrats! In a press release straight from the fiery depths, the Prince of Darkness announced, "Nothing says 'eternal damnation' like a party that promises endless taxes and bureaucratic red tape!"

Sources close to the Underworld say this endorsement is a strategic move. "We’re just here for the chaos," said a spokesperson for Hell, "and what better way to stir the pot than supporting policies that turn every day into a bureaucratic nightmare?"

The Devil’s top reasons for backing the Dems?

1. More Regulation: "We love seeing the government get involved in every detail of your life. It’s our idea of fun—akin to an endless line of bureaucratic hell!"

2. Higher Taxes: "Nothing makes our fiery realms feel like home more than the thought of hard-working Americans sweating over their paychecks just to see them vanish into thin air!"

3. LGBTQ+ Rights: "The Devil knows that gender confusion and identity politics are excellent tools for sowing discord and chaos. More rights mean more confusion, which is our specialty!"

4. Reproductive Rights: "Abortions and heated debates over reproductive rights keep people divided and distracted. It’s a win-win for our fiery agendas!"

5. Climate Change: "If there's one thing that warms our hearts, it’s watching people argue endlessly about climate change while we bask in the eternal flames of despair!"

6. Free Palestine Uprising: "Global conflicts are perfect for spreading chaos. The more unrest, the better!"

7. Open Borders: "Nothing fuels the fires of discontent like uncontrolled immigration and the ensuing chaos. It’s like a bonfire of epic proportions!"
The Devil added, "When you see us supporting a cause, you know it's a one-way ticket to... well, let’s just say it’s a hell of a good time!"

So buckle up, folks! If you’re looking for a rollercoaster of headaches, frustration, and divine irony, you know who to vote for. 😈👹🔥

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