TODAY'S NEWS, July 5, 2024 - The News of Today is the History of Tomorrow

IN POLITICAL NEWS

1) That's the way to be the fighter, Rutabaga! "No one's pushing me out!" says the angry Rutabaga at rumors he will be replaced on the DemoKKKrat ticket. Yeah, Rutabaga, the voters may have a say in that. Here is the latest polling from Remington showing President Trump up outside the margin of error or margin of fraud in every single swing state and then some.

2) DemoKKKrat governors rallied behind Rutabaga. They really have no other choice. Rutabaga did tell them he needs even more sleep. You know, that 10-4 grind is just too much. Some donors . . . including one of the people who ruined Disney, Abigail Disney, Roy's grandaughter, says she will withhold donoations to the DemoKKKrat Party until Rutabaga is replanted in a home.

3) Still seeking scapegoats, the Senior Skank pushed Rutabaga to fire staff, save these two, Anthony Bernal and Mike Donilon. So it appears for now Ron Klain, Anita Dunn, and Pramila Jayapal are out. The new guys have almost "Rasputin-like" influence over the Demented Pervert. But the more this unfolds, the dirtier it sounds, almost like a group of family insiders are keeping his condition secret from the media. Course that means no one else saw him stumbling up stairs, falling on stage, falling off a bike, walking the wrong direction, freezing during speeches, saying stupid crap, or engaging in his own evil, demonic fits of Hitlerian rage against "MAGA" for the better part of four years.

4) Sounds like they have a lot of work to do. Rutabaga told troops "I've been all around the world with you. I've been in and out of battles, anyway." Uhh, Rutabaga, Corn Pop don't count.

5) A couple of months ago Rutabaga's administration acted like they were actually concerned about the flood of illegal criminal invaders. Now they are reversing themselves on another issue, child mulilation. They do not mean it.

6) This skittlebiscuit just disqualified himself as Trump's veep, saying "we're at war with Russia. We just don't know it yet."

7) Amidst all the concern about Rutqabaga's senility, Kampuchea Harris gave a speech in which she called him the vice president. But she can't outdo the Demented Pervert who, in another speech, called himself the vice president and said he was proud to be the "first black woman . . . ." to serve as veep. Maybe that's why Dr. Sanjay Gupta called for the Demented Pervert to undergo a full cognitive test. That's ridiculous. Just because he mistook the Fourth of July for Christmas . . . .?

8) An American Airlines flight had to make an emergency landing after a passenger exposed himself and urinated in an aisle. Why is Rutabaga flying commercial?

9) Jill Stein noted a surge of donations to the communist "Green" Party after the bomb of a debate by Rutabaga. "Gooooooood."

10) "Baaaaaad." The Wisconsin Supes overturned the law that banned most ballot drop boxes.

11) The U.S. confiscated enough fentanyl to kill the population of the five biggest states---just in June.

12) A Mississippi judge ordered a nationwide stay on Rutabaga's Title IX changes that would allow men to compete against women. j

13) Kollyfornia is imposing permanent water restrictions on cities and towns.

14) When the military downsized in 1992, several vets received one-time buyouts. Now the Pentagram, er, the Pentagon wants its money back.

15) "Duty and Honor," a SpewMore backed PAC, and a dark money group, disbanded them quickly popped up again to dump money into campaigns. Would be better called Doody and Horror.

16) Scientists say they have discovered what causes migraines.

IN CULTURAL NEWS

17) This Kentucky megachurch pastor was charged with rape after being caught with a 15-year old girl, while this Kentucky megachurch has shut down for a month because it cannot get "sexual abuse insurance."

18) Go woke, go broke, even in the offering plates as the United Church of Christ, a total wokish non-Christian church, lost over 550 churches and 286,000 members in the last decade.

19) One of the many things wrong with universities: MIT's staff grew by over 1,200 while enrollment barely changed.

20) Well, duh. Social media is changing da youts' dating behavior. Jean Twenge in her great book "Generations" discussed this.

IN ECONOMIC NEWS

21) More on the war between companies and employees who are "working" from home and doing the "mouse shuffle" to pretend to be working.

22) Hudson Bay Co., parent of Saks Fifth Avenue, is taking control of 36 Nieman Marcus stores to avert bankruptcy.

23) USAA (United Services Automobile Association), founded to help service members insure autos, has fallen into wokeness and scam, as members have lost thousands of dollars and have lost trust in the bank.

24) Big Lots now threatening bankruptcy and closing of thousands of stores.

25) The number supporting "going green" has declined since 2022, even among DemoKKKrats.

26) Supposedly payrolls rose over 206,000 . . . but remember last month they revised downward a lot! Meanwhile the unemployment rate rose to 4.1% (real unemployment closer to 10%)

IN INTERNATIONAL NEWS

27) This won't work out the way the British voters think, but they are booting the Tory Party in favor of Labour---which will only import more alien invaders, spend more tax money they don't have on green nonsense, and impose more regulations with higher inflation. But the Tories offer no real alternative. The fact that Brit voters went left when the rest of Europe is going right shows how incompetent the Tories were at vax policy, immigration, the economy and the Uke war.

28) In France, Marie Le Pen has accused Macaraoni of seeking a coup after a round of last minute appointments.

29) Ahhh, those advanced, cultured Saudis just sentenced the Muslim comedian deemed the Islamic version of "South Park" to 13 years in prison.

IN ENTERTAINMENT NEWS

30) Did we watch the same movie? "Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F" tried desperately to regain that old magic, but failed. A few comedic moments could not overcome poor dialogue, horribly aged stars (John Ashton and Judge Reinhold), a plot thinner than Joe Biden's Depenz, and the same old score from the original films. This is a surprise given that Jerry Bruckheimer, the producer, rarely allows this to happen (see for example his "Bad Boys : Ride or Die"). Eddie Murphy, once charming, is bland, and the constant and unnecessary cursing reveals unimaginative scriptwriters. I give it a C.

AND FINALLY . . .

31) This is one you don't see every day: a Nigerian prophet faces backlash after 25 separate "Rapture" predictions. I have the perfect gig for this guy: Hoax Media Pollster.

Larry Schweikart

Rock drummer, Film maker,NYTimes #1 bestselling author

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