grateful that i never believed that this world was what "they" said it was

i'm sorry you're so gullible
wake up every day feeling the exact same way
it's fine to have yer routine, man
i'm bored w/ everyone but also myself sometimes
glad i didn't move to nyc or cali like i said i would
i like flying i just hate leaving my house
most people will never get to ag level
when do they not run away
i sound like david byrne holy shit
you can get ______ n still hate you
jump from rock to rock that's all they do
i must seem boring sitting here on the same rock
i have always explored my brain
how can you not be interested in exploring your brain
how can you know any mfing thing if you dunno yourself
plenty to learn when you either make stuff or break stuff
i know why i self-destructed
you pretend to be empowered
if i didn't drown from booze, saline or ocean water...
i guess i have to stick it out considering how many x God saved my stupid ass
hopefully less of the bad thing more of the good thing
i used to reside in the TAAKA portion of Hell
it's just as well that i went thru all that cos i can explain alcoholism better than anyone can (i've been told that at enough AA meetings haha)
i've earned my arrogance damnit