I Was a Drug Dealer! Freedomain Call In
Hey Stefan, I’ve listened to your show on and off for about 6 years. I’ve implemented many things you’ve taught about parenting and philosophy into my life. I currently have a 10 month old son and lovely wife who I connected with using tactics you taught me and we even listened to your show together when we first started dating.
Now for the bad stuff, I have found myself in a perpetual cycle of disconnection towards most of society. I definitely have a hard time hoping for any kind of good future. I have certain addictions that I struggle with that I’m not proud of. I have a brother who used to be my best friend and business partner who now won’t talk to me at all and hasn’t even met his nephew (my baby). My career and business plans have all grinded to a halt due to external conditions that I can’t control.
I really struggle with how I view life and what I enjoy. To put it simply and directly, I feel I’m still very immature and I feel completely unmotivated to try hard in life despite the fact I have a a beautiful sweet son.
I have deep seemingly unresolvable issues with family members that I think eat away at my joy and I can’t help but feel I’m watching our government system rob and abuse hardworking people to such a degree it feels like it almost pays not to work. It hurts because I struggle with addiction and deep cynicism towards normal life and I feel that makes me a time bomb of a problem for my son and his development. I don’t know what I’m going to tell him or what I’m guiding him to.
I feel just as selfish and dopamine driven as when I was 17 while I feel the world is worse then ever.
I know part of this weird feeling comes from some existential issues I’ve had from LSD use in my younger years paired with being raised in a heavy Christian cult where everyone spoke in tongues.
I feel like everyone around me has some kind of psychosis and it makes me feel very lonely.
I keep wishing I could have some kind of resolution with my family but I don’t see how.
If I had to pick one issue I could really use your help with in the midst of that pile of complaints, I would say drug addiction. Why am I the way I am? Why is it I feel like I’ve lost resolve.
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