Dear Papa

Working with the scraps I was given,

Papa made miracles just by giving thanks.

Please don't ever let yourself think that I am unwilling to change, to be more like YOU.

oh no no

HOWEVER,

I have prioritised other things & in different orders than you. Now you have my full blessing. You have my full gratitude.

I will learn to show you gratitude, the way a teenager LEARNS to appreciate what his father has taught him, it will grow PAST just lip-service & my actions will leave no room for doubt that I have learned the lessons being offered to me.

I recognise that these lessons are FULLY for my own benefit and that I have undervalued & misappropriated the privilege that I have been blessed with.

I am just so SLOW, Brothers. And beyond my learning curve & disabilities, I am also built to value different things.

I fall down & get back up. My family is coming around.m, but I HAVE to be able to give them not only emotional support, but also financial support.

I want to be the head of my household and that requires more than I have to offer right now.

I need to be, ,"the Man everyone can rely on at my father's funeral."

And right now, I Am nowhere even NEAR to that description.

I'm afraid to join a room full of governors and prime ministers and titans of finance and industry.

I will look and feel so inadequate and it will send me into a spin until I've learned to be more like you.

But it is coming, there's just some kinks that I've yet to workout before I can even stand next to men like you.