Human Moose Turd Bowling

The Tired Iron is a vintage snowmobile (or snowmachine, as Alaskans like to call them) race that takes place every year in Downton Fairbanks, Alaska. Held on the Frozen Chena River in temperatures that sometimes dip to -20F and colder, families come from all over interior Alaska to enjoy the races and participate in some fun and exciting games. There are many games to include a giant ping pong ball drop and ice Putt-Putt golf, but one of the favorites at this event is Human Moose Turd Bowling. Yes, you read that right! Everyone knows we have a lot of moose in Alaska, and Alaskans have come up with some pretty creative ways to poke fun at their turds, which are like giant jelly beans. This particular event is just for the little kiddies, but it’s obvious parents get a lot of enjoyment out of this as well. And this is how it works: There is an inner tube with a seat in the center. An assistant makes sure the child has a helmet on, and then instructs him how to get in, and where to hold on. After the child climbs in, the inner tube is placed inside a large rubber band. It takes two people to hold the child steady and pull back the rubber band, then – off they go! The child is propelled at a pretty good clip down an icy lane with 10 inflatable plastic moose turds, each standing 18 inches high and arranged as you would regular bowling pins. If the child knocks 6 or more pins over, they receive a wooden nickel which is good for a real game of bowling at a local bowling alley. Children and parents delight in watching each attempt to knock down as many moose turds as possible!