No, But If You Hum A Few Bars I'll Name It

1 year ago
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The father of a member of our troupe performed with the National Music Camp (now called the Interlochen Center for the Arts) National High School Orchestra in Interlochen, Michigan in the summer of 1952. The member was able to obtain copies of the NMC’s Sunday evening broadcasts and enjoyed listening to them over and over again. One of the pieces performed was Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov’s “Scheherazade,” which was the inspiration for this skit.

Caption: “The Study of Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov St. Petersburg, Florida, October 21, 1888.” - John C. Williams and Peter Demens co-founded Saint Petersburg, Florida in 1888. The city was named after Saint Petersburg, Russia, where Mr. Demens once lived.

Nikolai: “Oh, good, the maid is here with my Cappuccino Español. Just put it there on the table, please.” - The “Capriccio Espagnol” is a five movement orchestral suite which premiered on 31 October 1887 in St. Petersburg, Russia. It is based on Spanish folk melodies. The maid is humming an excerpt from the fourth movement ("Scene and Gypsy Song"), which was featured in the 1998 Pizza Hut commercial famously starring former Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev.

Nikolai: “Look, it’s very simple! Stop humming “Scheherazade!” You can hum, Scheherazade, but for the love of God, if you can’t stop humming “Scheherazade,” then please don’t hum, Scheherazade! Clear!?” – It appears to us that Mr. Rimsky-Korsakov could have avoided this whole mess if he didn’t name his piece after his maid.

Nikolai: “That’s Mr. Rimsky-Korsakov to you, Miss Pskov! Don’t you dare call me by that name again! Remember your place! Don’t make me rewrite you up again!” – Mr. Rimsky-Korsakov rewrote much of the work he composed prior to 1880, including his opera “The Maid of Pskov” (incidentally, the opera isn’t actually about a cleaning maid; “maid” in this case is referring to a maiden). The opera, also known as “Ivan the Terrible,” was originally written between 1868-1872, rewritten from 1876-1877, and rewritten yet again in 1891-1892. We here at CoBaD don’t think of rewriting as a sign of weakness; Giuseppe Verdi, for example, rewrote several of his operas. CoBaD has rewritten and re-recorded skits several times, and our cartoonist has used his fair share of white out (especially, fittingly enough, on this sketch). However, we feel that there comes a time when one simply has to let go and just move on to other works.

Nikolai: “Not now. Anyway, will you stop humming Scheherazade, Scheherazade? Honestly, you’ve been humming the first movement every single night now for the past 2 years, 8 months and 27 days including the end date! It’s driving me mad!” – Scheherazade is the main character in the fable “One Thousand and One Nights.” We think, though, that if the original Scheherazade had chosen to sing the same first movement over and over again rather that the tale telling strategy that she originally chose, she probably wouldn’t have made it past the first week.

Scheherazade: “You mean ‘The Sea and Sinbad’s Catamaran?’ May I remind you that YOU wrote it, Mr. R hyphen K…“ - Refers to “The Sea and Sinbad’s Ship.”

Nikolai: “Do you mean ‘The Calendar Princesses?’” – Refers to the second movement, “The Kalendar Prince.”

Scheherazade: “Okay then, how about I hum something from last two movements, you know, ‘The Lifeguard and the Paddleboarding Chick’ or ‘Spring Break at Baghdad, The Pontoon Boat, and The Beer Cooler Goes Overboard?’” – Refers to “The Young Prince and The Young Princess” and “Festival at Baghdad. The Sea. The Ship Breaks against a Cliff Surmounted by a Bronze Horseman.”

Nikolai: “No, they have bits of that damn violin theme in it, too. Redundant Variations on a Redundant Theme. Dreadful. Just like a piobaireachd competition.” – For more on this reference, see the “Crunluath a Mock” sketch.

Nikolai: “Look, Scheherazade, if you’re really serious about breaking into the music publishing business, you should consider investing in something with a better return rate than low-interest symphonic suites. You should consider my get rich quick scheme of operas.” - Starting in 1889, Mr. Rimsky-Korsakov dedicated himself almost exclusively to composing operas.

Scheherazade: “Buzz off queen!! This is my hive!” – For more on the history of Lambert, see the “Daydream Bleacher,” “I Tried Improvisation, Then I Was Perturbed” and “Booth Estranges Diction“ sketches.

Nadezhda: “My name! My name! AHHH!! Where’s my name!? Scheherazade!! Nikolai, honey!! I have a guest calling on me, but I don’t know what to call myself! I gotta find it!! AHHH!!” - Nadezhda Rimskaya-Korsakova (1848-1919) was a Russian pianist and composer, and the wife of Mr. Rimsky-Korsakov. Their relationship was very similar to the one between Robert Schumann and his wife Clara.

Nadezhda: “…Wait a minute. What am I thinking!? That’s Nikolai Gogol, my favorite short story writer, at the door. I’ll just do a Gogol search, he’ll tell me who I am (Smacks herself on the head). DUH!!” - Nikolai Gogol (1809-1852) was a novelist, short story writer and playwright. One of Mr. Gogol’s stories, “Christmas Eve,” was turned into operas by Tchaikovsky and Rimsky-Korsakov. As you can see, Nikolai was able to find the house, so clearly he didn’t use Gogol Maps.

Nadezhda: “Alright, alright, I’m coming! Keep your nose on!” - Mr. Gogol’s most bizarre short story, “The Nose,” was made into an opera by Russian composer Dimitri Shostakovich.

Voiceover: “Scheherazade’s cervical correction was provided by Republican Chiropractors.” - In Sophie Gengembre Anderson’s imagined portrait, Scheherazade is inexplicably tilting her head to her right.

Caption: “Reactionary alignments available! See Rumble podcasts for details!” – We think that should read “Reactionary alignments available! See OUR Rumble podcasts for details.” Republican Chiropractors’ “reactionary alignments” is of course referring to its own channel, and is in no way, shape or form making a generalization about all Rumble channels. Heavens, everyone knows that Rumble is no place to find reactionary podcasters, especially those “freedom of speech” advocates who focus more on the depth aspects of their freedoms rather than their breadth by harping on the same tired old handful of subjects over and over again.

Resources:

Wikipedia. Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikolai_Rimsky-Korsakov

Wikipedia. One Thousand and One Nights. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One_Thousand_and_One_Nights

Wikipedia. Scheherazade. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scheherazade_(Rimsky-Korsakov)

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