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The Number One Narcissistic Lie
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEXz135hWaM&t=305s
https://the-number-one-narcissistic-lie.mn.co/share/24ERh9nFleBZxHFV?utm_source=manual
The Number One Narcissistic Lie
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I recently announced that I'm going to start working as a public speaker. My main topics are dissociative amnesia, narcissistic abuse recovery, and how to set boundaries in all areas of your life.
As I started writing, I discovered something important, which I call the number one narcissistic lie.
The first thing I want to share is I come from a violent family. I was targeted as the scapegoat and all my family members dumped their pain and anger on me.
At the age of 19, I began counseling because I was in a lot of mental pain, and I wanted it to stop.
At one point, I was working with a coach. She told me repeatedly that my family was broken, but I didn't believe her.
I believed that if I could find what was wrong and fix it, I'd have the family I always wanted.
That all changed when I had a vicious fight with my mother and brother. After the fight I became sick for a month.
When I recovered, my coach asked me to write out a timeline of the abuse. I did and covered a period of 30 years. When I finished and read what I wrote, I thought, "Why am I still talking to these people?"
The obvious answer is because you're family, but if I remove the label of "family" and look at the behaviors alone I would have ended the relationship decades ago. I would never have allowed any "friend" to treat me the way that you do. I've allowed the label of "family" and the implications of that to blind me to the truth.
When I consider how much I've suffered I realize I'm long overdue to get out. Every time we connect there's always the threat of violence and worse, ongoing manipulation.
After this realization I contacted my coach, and I asked her for help in writing a PFO letter.
What does PFO stand for?
“Please Fuck Off.”
laughter
I’m Canadian; we’re polite.
After that, I sent the letter and said, “effective immediately, I’m going permanent, no contact and I never want to see you again, nor do I want to hear from you by mail, email, phone or otherwise.”
I also found out, belatedly, that both of my parents were narcissists.
If you are involved with a narcissist, there are a few things you MUST know!
You cannot fix a narcissist. Cut your losses and GET OUT NOW!!
And when you get out, go no-contact. NEVER go back. Why? Because narcissists can cause severe mental and emotional damage that could mess you up for years.
I'm telling you this so you don't make the same mistake as I did. If you do, you could waste months, years, or decades of your life.
Get on my calendar to learn more.
https://calendly.com/emaillists
Thanks for watching.
Get my book, Life After Bullying
https://nathansegal.org/life-after-bu...
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