A Dark Night of The Soul: How to Process Your Deepest Emotional States

You know we are TOLD how LOVE is the most powerful force in the universe?
The video I have posted here, is me in this deep sadness- but shifting through it into peace.
It will teach people how to move THROUGH such pain. -The deepest stuff.
The stuff no-one ever teaches….coaches skate about on the surface of the pond, spouting new age nonsense about x,y and z….but they skirt around revealing the deep dark places and moving OUT of them…but in this time, in this battle, this is essential!
Here you see me at my most miserable, the female essence, caught in centuries of horrible distortion, preventing us for truly valuing our beautiful LOVE POWER: caught in the battle raging about us now, which is attempting to kill all that is good in our world and prevent it from triumphing.

Watch how this goes from utter sadness and despair, through surrender , towards healing and revealing more information. The change of perspective allows the energy to flow again.

Our men have to fight…….they do, but they need to fight with love in their hearts….clearing their field again and again, through uniting with their beloved women.
THEY DO HAVE TO FIGHT, AND THEY MUST EMBRACE LOVE -this is the true conundrum.

If the men can allow love in while they are fighting, we have won. If they cannot, we have lost. Their mind programs will set in, and take over, as they operate within the paradigm of war.... we have to introduce this power of love once more into the realm. The thing the dark shit fears the very most, is this functioning throughput of LOVE, because it poofs that dark stuff into nonexistence....

Well, it is no wonder that dark forces do all they can to block and interfere with great love. They understand the power they can hold at bay by activating the lower emotions. Outside elements are putting their ALL into keeping us apart through stirring guilt and sadness, disappointment and shame.

Experiencing a diminishing and loss of my beautiful love relationship- as pressures from every direction close in around us…he feeling bad to communicate, knowing how awful certain aspects of the situation are for me, as the battle field comes to me and my life in its most basic elements.….
I do NOT give up. This is the point. I refuse to.

2.15 “Your Spirit is feeling cut to pieces…..The memory of before, hurts so deeply, for you have loved and lost in this life. Not through death, through dark intervention.
Great Spirit, take these blocks from our eyes- please.
Is there anything I can do for him?
How can I have the strength to reverse this situation?
How can I have the courage and the strength to build this right? ( I dont know how to do it….)

3.03 Finally I have to say I am important. I don’t know how to say that. I don’t know how to know it, how to hold it, how to feel it, how to be it. I know I am… ( I wrote a song, “Feel Important”, knowing this was at the heart of my soul injury as a female and as the child who experienced what she did.)

But I don’t know how to show it or say it. I don’t know how to do it, I don’t know how, I don’t know how…..(I cry deeply.)
Show me, talk to me….
3.33 Help me…I have Ariel, from The Tempest (Shakespeare), telling Prospero how well he has completed the task of his illusion of a storm.
I must find a way to build myself. I have no idea - how. I need to build myself, and I don’t know how.
4.04 I need to be shown, I need to know it now: I will count down from ten to zero, and once I get there, i will find a book, or something which will help me.
I have a large book in my hand. inside is a three-dimensional pop-up model of a strange kind of light-bulb. It opens up and gets bigger, turning into a kind of circular sailing ship. I feel like Alice in Wonderland, sailing on my own tears….I get into it and see where it takes me: there is a flume of liquid, and I follow it in this strange little ship. I jump off a waterfall, into dry land- it’s sandy desert, but I have a flask of water in my pocket.
There is a camel, I get onto the camel and we ride. it’s hot, but my flask of water is always filled. For some reason, I like the sunshine: it does my heart good to have the warmth of the sun on my chest.
There is an oasis, I get down from the camel. ( My lovely cousin posted an image of this the day before- a streak of water, surrounded by vegetation amid the golden sands, in Libya.)
I am underneath the fig trees, it’s pleasant, coolish to my feet. I sit down and someone brings me a meal.
It is kind of them…thank you!
There are some children playing there, just the way children do: with their funny banter and noisy squawks. One of them runs up to me and shows me cricket in their hand. Like a little gem, a little jewel. Innocent.
Then someone takes me by the hand. ( I cry once more.) Oh my God….they are holding me to their chest, just holding me, just holding me. I need to cry….my heart is so broken.
Someone is brushing my hair. They ( the men in this world…because of the programming inserted into all of them) don’t understand.
6.40 I see him ( my beloved) as a boy. I loved him then, somehow. I don’t know how…( we are seven years apart in age though…)
I ask my friend, “Is there any way we can repair this? Is there any way we can bring this to a place of goodness again? - And love? God, please show me, please, please show me. Make me to a place where there is harmony and love and goodness. There is true love between us. ( I cry again- I have cut that out..)
7.06 “What do I hate about myself so much, that I can’t….I need to look at me. there’s something, there’s something I hate about myself, and I don’t know what it is. it’s something that’s been hurt, somehow, I don’t know what….something, something!
7.25 That butterfly with the pin through it’s chest, what is it? ( from yesterday’s investigation into my deepest hidden fears…see LINK. I realised it is about me not allowing myself to be the soul-resonance teacher that I truly am, just like the man whose soul essence was in that original butterfly )
7.34 What is it that I believe that’s false about me? Tell me, what do i believe about myself, which is false?!
I need to know: 5,4,3,2,1 now! I open my book again: I don’t believe the sentence in there, it read, “there is no justice in life.” I turn the page….there are just hateful things in this book, there are just hateful tings…( I cry again, realising all the nastiness implanted into my psyche.) “They can’t be true, they can’t be true, they can’t be true, they’re not true.” ( I read the things in the book, knowing they are untruths about me.) “Who would say that? Who would say that?”
8.06 “Please help me GOD, please, please, please help me. What is is I believe about myself which is NOT true?
I need to know. It cannot be just the cruel words of my ‘mis-jointed’ mother, telling me I am a, ”selfish brat”- that cannot be true, I should know more than that.
There must be something more, something…because I know I’m good, I’m beautiful…..I need to know, I need to know. I need to know, I need to know what I truly am.
8.44 I need to be in full knowledge of what I truly am.
I need to be in full knowledge of what I truly am.
I need to be in full knowledge of what I truly am.
I need anything which is not true about self, to be burnt-off now.
9.06 Prime Creator, you are going to burn off anything that is not true about me now. Prime Creator, you are going to burn off anything that is not true about me now. Prime Creator, you are going to burn off anything that is not true about me now.
9.17 I have reached the moment, I have reached the time, where I will no longer carry untruths about myself.
I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, remove the untruths that my mind has been telling me about myself. I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, remove the untruths that my mind has been telling me about myself. I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, remove the untruths that my mind has been telling me about myself. 10.9.8.7.6.5.4.3.2.1, now.
10.03 I am….I am LOVE. I am pure love. I am pure love. I am pure love.
10.13 Show me the falsities I believed about myself. My mother told me many stupid things, and my father. they must have been in deep pain to have put these upon me. -Deep anguish and struggle and ‘capture’.
10.31 What am I? I am the creative force. I am OF Prime Creator, Of GOD.
10.38 I am blessed by GOD. I am blessed by GOD. I am blessed by Source. I am blessed by Source. I am blessed by Source. I am blessed by Prime Creator. I am blessed by Prime Creator. I am blessed by Prime Creator. I am blessed by Prime Creation. I am blessed by Prime Creation. I am blessed by Great Spirit. I am blessed by Great Spirit. I am blessed by Great Spirit.
I am blessed by Life. I am blessed by Life. I am blessed by Life. I am blessed in this Life. I am blessed in this Life. I am blessed in this Life.
11.33 Any curses put upon me, any dark, erroneous words, any false beliefs put-upon me, they go back to their sender, to their makers. Any curses put upon me, any dark, erroneous words, they go back to their makers, those who put them upon me. Any curses put upon me, any dark, erroneous words, they go back to their makers, it is sent back to them. 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1, now.
12.02 I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, show me why I came here. I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, show me why I came here. I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, show me why I came here. 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1, now.
12.22 There is a doorway, - a little like Antelope Canyon in Arizona. it feels carved like that, but it is a tall doorway It has a pointed top, a curved side, very tall, very tall, fifteen times my height. I go through it. On the other side it’s light, it’s bright. I walk in this space, it’s pleasantly warm. It feels like the beautiful warm sunlight of a sunny day, when you have thin summer clothes. I almost feel like I am naked in this space. My hair is actually long and flowing. It feels beautiful on my back: soft, gently bouncing….I think my feet are in sand. Oh, in a little warm water. It feels so simple. It feels so sensual- I feel really horny- like Venus, Venus de Milo: I am here to celebrate all aspects of the life.
13.13 This ( posting to my face), this is real life. These are the dark places we have to move through. -Sometimes, so painful.
13.33 Before I came up here to do this, I was outside in the garden: twenty minutes standing on the bare, damp grass. In the middle of the night, looking at a star, which expanded very largely….and calling-in all the help I could…I was in such pain. My heart still aches, physically. When love cannot flow, when it is stopped, and there are elements and forces at work, which seek to stop it, - it is not in their interests….especially when there are two humans, who have great power. I have been made… the plays, the games…this time, my life, my psyche was always about ‘how worth-less I am’. “Nothing’- that I am a nothing, no importance, no value- all of that, it was all about that. It was all about the ‘nothingness’ of what I was. - The way my mother would speak to me, the way my father would ignore me.- All these things, as though it was apparently ‘appalling’ to say of anything, that you were ‘good’, or capable. And you can see that in my life, the way it was reflected: those patterns are very dangerous to a soul. Because they hold them in thrall- a very small kind of existence. If you cannot take off those shackles, if you cannot recognise them, you are like my last talk- the one with the butterfly-pinned, when I showed the fears. You are literally held there, you cannot fly, you cannot be who you are. You have false beliefs: remember the ‘erroneous beliefs’?
15.15 I command Prime Creator, I command Prime Creation, to remove all, and every single remnant or erroneous belief from within my self. - That I may recognise them, when I see them, when I hear them in my mind, when I feel them when I create them. And that I will no longer support them in any shape or form. I will no longer give them any of my energy. I will no longer give them any of my consent, any of my assent. All of those erroneous beliefs, I now collect: ‘these’ ( showing them) are NOT a part of me. They go: here, my ‘zipper to Source’ ( I open a portal using a zip in the air) In…whooooo.
16.08 I am NOT that. I am very different to that. I am good, I am love, and joy! THat’s a big one, the joy. I am great rumbling peals of laughter and joy. I am very large energy. I have enormous capacity for love, and listening and understanding and joy. I have immense creativity: anything i set my mind to, I can create. My only barrier and boundary has been those things (pointing to what I just banished). My love is true and loyal and bright- I AM beautiful. Human souls are beautiful: when we choose to come in here, we come from a place of such purity, such clarity of who and what we are, it enables us to move through this space. -TO bear the ‘unbearables’. TO feel the tearing and the ripping and the breaking- somehow withstand it. Somehow pluck it out form ourselves and heal ourselves again and come back to the bright, pure soul-self.
17.29 This is the truth of the journey. The original person, from behind the veil, before the birth, may incarnate fully: this is where I am, this is where you are. This is the time for this.
The pains, thew pains, the cutting, the tearing, the ripping, the shredding….the mashing, the bruising….yeah, it sticks into the physicality, it’s true. It sticks into the etheric, it’s true.
18.03 However, you have a Spirit, a Soul, - that is beyond ALL of that. And when you command that to be an override, “ I command my Spirit to be in full override, that all that I have accrued that was pain, that all that I have accred that was fear, and torment, I release it form every cell of my body. I release it form every level fo my etheric self. And I return to my full Being, my full Spirit. I command Prime Creator to give me all of me now in my life, in my life.”
19.12 You know, I do this as an example, because I am a teacher to my core: no make-up, tears, bogeys out of my nose… (! Chuckle)- Because it’s not about that. We need to know how to do these things. I dint know what I was going to do before I got on here and showed myself. I have to show myself to know it, and I want to inspire anyone who needs it. We need this now: we need our full, beautiful, pure true selves.
19.52 That crap, which has just invaded our world, we have to, we have to brush it away- cobwebs, dusty, spider cobwebs. it has no business being here. I tis our journey, it is our power, it is our right. It is not our duty, it is our wish- we can do it, it is our joy! - To remove that ‘shit’ ( chuckle), to remove it. To remove their interference: to remove it!
20.29 Thank you! And next time I see yo, i might look a bit prettier! (Chuckle) This- I hope you feel strongly: I hope you can feel it, and take some steps for yourself. The danger is always the ideas you ave implanted in you, which are not true. - Not true, they are not true, they are not true. They hold no truth. This is a very different world when we realise that. 


P.S. My beloved was able to contact me after this and come together with me in love- which he had been unable to do for the past two weeks…..such is the power of our Spirit.

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“My mission, is to teach people to be their full selves. - That’s always been it, whether it’s a child, or an adult or a toad, you know- it’s always been that.”

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