Seven Bins Sunak’s insane Net Zero speech was comedy gold.

1 year ago
74

Rishi Sunak comically made up Net Zero policies so he could pretend to scrap them & has destroyed his party in the process.
Right, so Rishi Sunak just gave the career ending speech to end all careers. Already languishing in double figures behind Labour in the polls he decides to give a speech that showed without doubt how desperately bad things have become since his comms director left, literally standing up and banning stuff that was never government policy, might have been a consultation at one point in some kind of mad Columbian marching powder induced brainstorming session, but which made Sunak just sound utterly deranged and his desperate look what I’ve done schtick, 7 I won’t make you have 7 bins so I scrapped that, I don’t believe in a meat tax, so I scrapped it too inflections were just maddening, but not half as mad as what he was actually talking about. Seven bins Sunak he’ll be known for, from now until the end of time, so congratulations Rishi, you finally did something memorable!
A ban on having 7 bins, the 7 deadly bins! I thought I’d seen it all when you Tories started ripping off the Green Party with your suddenly no longer blue election materials, who knew Count Binface was an inspiration for you as well! Putting 7 bins out each week, the dustcarts will have to become monster trucks or something, or is it a case of every night becoming bin night, as we have one for every day of the week. Craig David could do a rewrite of his song 7 days and call it seven bin days! We could bin a Tory on Monday, then another one on Tuesday, we can bin another on Wednesday and on Thursday and Friday and Saturday and again on Sunday! Sounds like a plan to me! How about banning a meat tax, who knew about the meat tax? Stealthy vegetarian wokerati at work I suppose! I’m quite glad he’s binned this made up Tory policy to be honest, I thought to myself enforced veganism was on the cards, the cost of living crisis would put meat out of our reach, you could get fined in the street for thinking about pork, chicken nugget dealers will be springing up on street corners, and turkey twizzlers will become a Class C drug. A ban on taxes to discourage flying, well that was a blatantly self serving move given Sunak takes private jets like we catch a taxi. He took 23 private flights over a period of 187 days including one trip from London to Blackpool on a 14 seat RAF jet when it was only a 3 hour train trip. A ban on compulsory car sharing he said, well if it means banning James Corden from our TV’s as a consequence then I’m all for it, I’m joking obviously, but still, ban James Corden, it makes as much sense as anything else Sunak came out with.

►SOURCES:
https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/politics/breaking-top-tory-demands-general-30986080
https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/politics/sunak-pledges-to-stop-hypothetical-things-that-dont-exist-357600/
https://x.com/OliDugmore/status/1704528678980325526?s=20
https://x.com/implausibleblog/status/1704595777572515891?s=20
https://x.com/RishiSunak/status/1704522548648509467?s=20
https://x.com/RishiSunak/status/1704518476998852987?s=20

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