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
The Right to Purr-sonal Space: Cats demand uninterrupted alone time, and any disturbance shall be met with a stern look and a sassy tail flick.
No Bath Days, Ever: Cats have a constitutional right to avoid water-related activities. Baths are hereby banned unless approved by a unanimous vote of fellow feline citizens.
Freedom of Napping: Cats shall have the freedom to nap anywhere, anytime. Including on top of your keyboard, your face, and that book you were reading.
Right to Treats & Temptations: Access to treats, temptations, and tasty morsels shall be provided on-demand. Humans are required to respond to snack requests promptly.
Legalize Catnip: The recreational use of catnip shall be decriminalized. Catnip parties are encouraged, and all cats have the right to a "nip trip."
Bye-Bye Vacuums: Vacuum cleaners are officially considered public enemies and shall be banished from feline territories forever.
Universal Scratching Posts: Every corner shall be furnished with a scratching post to ensure proper claw maintenance. Humans caught hiding scratching posts shall face judicial consequences.
Boxes, Boxes, Boxes: Cats shall have unlimited access to cardboard boxes. Boxes are hereby declared neutral territories where all conflicts shall be resolved peacefully.
Right to Midnight Zoomies: No curfew for midnight zoomies. Cats shall have the right to sprint around the house in the pursuit of invisible foes at any hour.
Cat TV Subscriptions: All households must provide subscriptions to Cat TV, broadcasting a never-ending loop of birds, squirrels, and laser pointers.
Fashion Freedom: Cats are free to wear or not wear any attire as they see fit. Though, tiny hats and bowties are highly encouraged.
Legal Representation for Tail Pulling Cases: In cases of unauthorized tail pulling, kittens shall be entitled to legal representation and compensation in the form of extra treats.
Feline Technology Consultants: Cats must be involved in the development of any technology involving laser pointers, strings, or moving images on screens.
National Cuddle Day: A designated day where all humans must provide non-stop cuddles, belly rubs, and chin scratches.
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