To conspire is to breathe with

You don’t have to attempt to change a separate self to please someone or to avoid displeasing someone. You are not a separate self, and you gain no value from the pretend separateness, positively or negatively judged, of any self seen through this distorted lens. The one you would please or displease is also seen as separate, which cannot ever be. Focus on what is actual here–that which joins you with the one you would please or displease right now, and all struggle to make an impression on anyone vanishes.

https://lovesbeginning.com/2023/08/08/to-conspire-is-to-breathe-with/