Fast X - the beginning of the end

1 year ago
17

Follow along as RANKED reviews a new movie release every week of 2023, slowly compiling the best films of the year into our sacred hierarchical list.

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Previous Episode 2023 RANKED List:
1. Beau Is Afraid
2. Infinity Pool
3. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
4. John Wick: Chapter 4
5. Tetris
6. Air
7. Creed III
8. Shazam! Fury of the Gods
9. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
10. M3GAN
11. missing
12. Scream VI
13. The Super Mario Bros. Movie
14. Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania
15. Renfield
16. Evil Dead Rise
17. The Pope’s Exorcist
18. Magic Mike’s Last Dance
19. Knock at the Cabin
20. Plane
21. Cocaine Bear
22. Knights of the Zodiac

Fast X follows my two rules for sequels: never undermine your essence, and escalate. These movies so far have never undermined their essence: fast cars, street races, exciting vehicle driven missions, and of course, family. These movies are shamelessly entertaining, somehow consistently delivering on-character emotional punches within the most bizarre and cartoon-like of circumstances, so if you come into this party to complain about realism, please fuck off until you can manage to get that stick surgically removed from your rectum. You gotta like your entertainment with extra cheese to hang out with this crew.

However, you can only escalate so far. We all know the #1 rule in this franchise: if you’re the bad guy from the previous movie, you join the family in the next film. It is THE sticking point that gives this series its charm.

But this new baddie makes a point of going against that trope, telling us the audience that they’re aware that they can’t keep this up forever and hopefully will be closing up shop for good soon because the family dinner table is getting a little crowded. Please please please bring back everybody for one last ride, and then respectfully and lovingly lay this adored franchise, and Dominic Toretto, to rest.

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