Cocaine Bear | 2023 Movies RANKED - Episode 8

1 year ago
35

Follow along as RANKED reviews a new movie release every week of 2023, slowly compiling the best films of the year into a sacred hierarchical list.

Previous Episode RANKED List:
1. Infinity Pool
2. M3GAN
3. missing
4. Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania
5. Magic Mike’s Last Dance
6. Knock at the Cabin
7. Plane

Cocaine Bear is the perfect example of a movie with a unique idea that, upon watching it, you quickly realize is just that: a singular idea. A bear doing cocaine may be “funny” for a minute or two in any other movie, but not enough to sustain its own movie, because once the novelty wears off we need something else. Anything else. But this movie has nothing else. And as far as tone goes I have no idea what this is. It’s not funny enough to be a comedy. It’s not thrilling enough to be a thriller. And it’s certainly not a dark comedy. A comedy doesn’t suddenly become “dark” just because it’s excessively violent. Dark comedies have grit and are played straight, and the humor comes from the absurdity of the events transpiring within that serious tone. Instead this movie has the bright and shiny appearance and obnoxious performances of a cartoon, but nothing clever or interesting beyond its ear-catching title. If you haven’t seen this movie yet, DON’T. Whatever idea you have in your head right now based on the title is far better than what the movie actually is, so please, live out the rest of your life with that and stay far away from this loathsome and unfunny piece of scat.

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