SafeBank 2031 – No More Passwords!

1 year ago
30

What will the world look like when we no longer need passwords? Check out SafeBank in action! Note: This is a re-upload of an old video that was mysteriously deleted some time ago.

“At SafeBank, the future is here. We no longer require passwords for any of our services! That was our customers’ number one complaint, and we listened. Using a range of artificial intelligence and voice recognition software, you can trust that your money is safe at SafeBank.” ~ SafeBank commercial, March 2031.

Welcome to SafeBank. Please state your username in a clear and loud voice.
~Andy26
Welcome Andy26. To confirm that you are human, please answer the following questions in a clear and loud voice.
Are you a robot?
~No.
Just to confirm, please state you are not a robot.
~Yes, that’s right.
Please state you are not a robot.
~I’m not a robot.
Please state, “You are not a robot”.
~You are not a robot?
Look at the following picture. How many traffic lights can you see?
~Um, 5?
How many traffic lights can you see?
~Do you mean sets of traffic lights or individual lights?
How many traffic lights can you see?
~1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11?
A sequence of animals has been sent to your mobile device. Please state the animals in the correct order.
~Tiger, lion, panther, cheetah, mountain lion?
Please state the animals in the correct order.
~Tiger, lion, panther, cheetah, cougar?
Please state the animals in the correct order.
~What the f***? Tiger, lion, panther, cheetah, lynx?
Please state the animals in the correct order.
~I don’t know what the last animal is!
Would you like for me to send you a new set of animals?
~Yes please.
A sequence of animals has been sent to your mobile device. Please state the animals in the correct order.
~Oh come on! Horse, zebra, donkey, pony, mule?… Thank God.
From the following, choose your favourite food.
~Pizza.
From the following, choose your favourite food.
~Ice cream?
From the following, choose your favourite food.
~Broccoli?
Lastly, to prove that you are human, how are you feeling now?
~Frustrated!
Welcome to online banking! Would you like to make a transaction?
~Yes.
How much would you like to transact?
~$100.
To confirm that you are human, please answer the following questions in a clear and loud voice.
Are you a robot?
~F*** off!
Exiting application. Thank you for using SafeBank, the first and only bank to not use annoying passwords. Have a nice day!

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