#JustForToDaamnDay 1-23-23 w/ #DaamnKam @DaamnTalk - ‘#Narcissisticsociopath #MandieStaretsFoote

1 year ago
40

An Outside perspective on Internal affairs: Envy is the death of sanity.
Being jealous or envious of another only leads to self deprivation. In a sense, we’re stacking up what we don’t have against what we perceive another individual to have… this is definitely a recipe for disaster. For starters, we never really know what it is they actually have; looks, like smells, (& people), can be deceiving. Imagine it this way, take the vast amount of self knowledge that you have gained throughout your life & stack it up against the minutiae of information you ‘believe’ you have of another.
As someone who went through the first 27 years of life in the ‘DUI’ lane, it’s fair to say that we’ve lost (almost) everything at least 3 very memorable times. Working to earn back what We’d either given up or ‘lost’ has been frustrating to say the very least. Establishing Our own business on 3 different occasions has given Us the wherewithal & foresight required to see life in the light of reality, (or something resembling such). Sleeping on a couch in a recovery house with 8 roommates while waiting for Our first born son to arrive… wasn’t ideal. (But, neither was not yet possessing a drivers license to get Ourself to the hospital when that Muzikal day’d finally arrive…)
Synchronistically, We acquired Our license just two days later, while we were still in the hospital just after his birth on 8-31-20.
Flash forward, 12-15-22, awaiting the birth of Our second child while sleeping in Our own room with two, older, very familiar & slightly annoying ‘roommates’… (We Love you both!) As different as the situation is on the surface, it’s very familiar. Already having acquired Our drivers license, having just established Our business in Our new home state of Hawaii & being in a Healthy, committed relationship to Our partner helps Us keep intact the perspective We’ve gained over the last few years. As a new father. As a man in longterm Recovery from the disease of Drug addiction. As a survivor of psychological warfare, having underwent narcissistic emotional abuse beyond scale. (We’re VERY afraid for our Son Muzik, still residing with her.)
Today, with 33 months of consecutive sobriety as a result of practicing a program for life worth living, though we’re still struggling with the repercussions from faults of who Kam used to be, We have a sense of *Real authenticity in Our relationships. Truthful narratives, honest opinions & genuine discussion were all lacking for so long in Our Recovery because We refused to accept Life on Life’s terms. Reality. One learns more than they’d want when living with such a spiritually sick individual… the lies & deceit being the blandest of flavors within that semi-sadistic-smoothie. Topped with a dash of denial, we were (almost) ready to give up EVERYTHING in order to try & be a ‘Family unit’ for Our son.
That mindset, almost cost Us everything… Fortunately, We didn’t lose our Recovery! (Our sanity is a different story.)
Thank ‘God’ for a daily reprieve, whether Our weekly support groups, bi-monthly councilor sessions, monthly therapist appointments or the every other month visits to the psychotherapist - honestly letting a variety of people (& professionals) into Our life has allowed Us to achieve more of an outside perspective on internal affairs. Anyone who knows ‘ol DaamnKam here can attest; We are wired differently. We are not only an over analyzer, we’re a critical thinker. Without various trusted sources to float our ideas to, we could easily begin to think we have it figured out. When conflict arises, there are options for discovering the Truth. Facts don’t care about Our feelings. Talking with others helps to achieve a balanced emotional state.
Our parents, sister, friends, life partner & children can all be grateful that Kam no longer thinks he’s ‘God’.

Our sons mom, who is still making horrendous allegations, [Lies], (new ones), almost 2 years after she had Us, (Son’s Father), legally removed (?) [She didn’t provide 1 exhibit in court to back up any of her claims-still got order] -Causing Us to get passionately involved with #FathersRights
*Many people are a little narcissistic, especially addicts like Us! -some more than others & some are a truly diagnosable #narcissist, #Narcissistic Personality : a disconnect between emotion & action. More specifically, folks with NPD are more prone to sufficiently ‘mirror’ people into liking them (‘mirroring’ is an act of imitating the behaviors one believes the other to find desirable in themselves), causing them to unknowingly ‘fall in love with themself.) Those with NPD have trouble identifying their own role in things, seeing how their behavior emotionally effects those around them, tracing real-life ‘effects’ back to any particular ‘causes’. Often compartmentalize &/or use some aspect, some ‘facet in fact’, to manipulate the creation of an ongoing false narrative. (Sprinkle it with truth so it’ll go down as such.) -D.K

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