BROAD THINKING: Why Do Women Love Pete Davidson

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Background Music Credit:
Music: Hang for Days - Silent Partner https://youtu.be/A41A0XeU2ds

If there was one solid indicator that the end of the world is near, it’s the fact the women love Pete Davidson. I’m sure the Mayans wrote about it somewhere and it’s gotta be in the book of Revelations.

But could someone explain this to me? He is devoid of all masculinity. He is a grade-A pussy. And worst of all - he dated a Kardashian.

Every-time I see this guy, one of my eggs spontaneously dries up.

What ever happened to tall, dark, and handsome? When did it become soft, pale, and jaundiced?

The media likes to refer to him as BDE - big !@#$ energy.

Have you looked at this guy?

I’m not talking about his features. On that, I have no opinion. No one can control how they look. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, afterall. I’m talking about how he displays himself - which is something he can control. Now how someone even looks wouldn’t normally get a rant. but this dude just throws himself out in public like he is some sort of god walking amongst mere mortals. His whole shtick is his gross demeanor, so for that, I do have commentary.

The tattoos are utterly macabre. It looks like the wall of a bathroom stall in a dive bar. At best, he looks like a walking version of a Chipotle bag. The amount of money he has spent on those could probably feed all of Staten Island. But it’s more than the waste - it's the look. That’s an extreme version of tattooing - like beat nick, hoodlum, trailer park, homemade county jail tattoo level of trash.

Furthermore, has this guy ever even seen the sun? He’s so white and pasty that Mayonnaise is jealous. And this doesn’t do any favors for his clothes. While I’m sure he’s loaded, his wardrobe looks like you gave a color blind hobo a hundred dollars to spend at Goodwill.

Let’s boomerang back around to the jaundice thing, though. Has no one told him that his eyes are yellow? Someone should really direct him to a doctor’s office ASAP.

When did this sickly, weak, sloppily dressed, poor excuse for a man become the standard bearer of good looks? I know that gender is now non-binary, but can we at least agree on what a good looking man should look like? Surely we can get in the ballpark.

This guy dated a Kardashian, was engaged to Ariana Grande, and is now dating Emily Ratajkowski. I guess sluts love repulsive men. Maybe it’s because he is so gross looking it makes them look better or perhaps it’s the shock value. I’d say it’s because he is funny, but Pete has to be the least funny and talented man to ever walk on the set of SNL or perform standup in the last 40 years.

Just think what will happen to future humans if women accept Pete Davidson as an icon of male perfection? Men will obviously acquiesce because they’re stupid and will do anything for a little female attention. People will get uglier and nastier. Our progeny will start to downgrade. This isn’t just commentary - this is a public service announcement. I don’t want to live in a world of undeserving, self-absorbed, arrogant losers like Pete who think they can walk around like a trailer park bum.

We live in a world where women feel compelled to wear makeup. Yet, men don’t really do anything to themselves. Look around. It started before Pete Davidson. Millennial men and the subsequent generations of men just swipe on apps and watch video game streamers all day. Not a lot of room for personal grooming or taking pride in one’s appearance. It’s only getting worse with men - I mean boys- like Pete Davidson. He’s sinking the ship. Perhaps the only form of retaliation is if women start completely giving up, too.

I’m just waiting for the female Pete Davidson to come along. A trashy, disgusting broad who, when just seeing a photo, you can smell their stench. Yet, somehow, they get all the men. It won’t happen. No man would tolerate that. No man would date some pig just to get attention. Toxic masculinity ain’t that toxic.

Welcome to modern day feminism: where we not only bring down the quality of our lives, but we accept piss-poor quality men just to be trendy and satiate our insecurities.

From first to third wave feminism, we went from mothers and housewives to stressed out women doing the mothering, wifing, and working. Fourth wave was really the chef’s kiss final touches to this hell hole. Now we’ve finally flipped the dynamic between the sexes on its head. While it seemed cute to cut out masculinity in favor of soy-boy, tofu eating weaklings, look what it got us? No 50’s-woman would let this happen. She didn’t cook, clean, and wrestle the kids all day to see a Pete Davidson like creature walking through the door. But hey, we're woke and fly our feminist flag while wearing our pussy hats. Our reward? Androgynous little twerps that look less like eye candy and more like the human equivalent of SPAM. Thanks Pete Davidson.

REFERENCES:
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-11429853/MailOnline-looks-Pete-Davidsons-dating-history.html