Get the Shot: Clear and Present Danger

A Man of Ordinary Sense and Understanding, Can I Get an A-Man?

If You Thought Hershel Walker's Vampires and Werewolves Were Weird, Walk on Water Warnock Wigging Out Webb

[FOB FREEDOM, December 26, 2022] Any station? Any station? Do you read? Over.

Reporting live from the world’s newest banana republic, it was George Washington Carver, in the Atlanta Compromise that had suggested the thought, “Cast down your buckets where you are”, but, at least according to medical experts at Healthline, “there is very limited research to show that drinking more than your hydration requirements benefits your health”, and “drinking a gallon (3.8 liters) of water per day is likely arbitrary and unnecessary — unless your body requires that much water for proper hydration”, but one recently re-elected pastor in Atlanta who had encouraged the congregation at America’s Freedom Church, the Ebenezer Baptist Church and former pulpit of the slain civil rights leader Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., has arbitrarily and capriciously decided to make a new year's resolution for his congregation to enjoy the full benefits of baptism by immersion, resolving to drink a gallon of water per day, raising concerns at least for one pesky candidate known well from coast to coast from Blue Virginia to progressives in chic coffee houses in Seattle as having been opposed to the government response to the current public health crisis, a pandemic the President had declared over shortly after a damning peer reviewed study demonstrating a risk as high as 36% for the popular Pfizer product in what business reporters at Bloomberg had described as the biggest vaccine campaign in history, administering as many as the latest vaccination rate is 261,820 doses per day, on average, by October 6th, but on all evidence not a popular choice for DoD civilians and contractors, where, according to the DoD product dashboard only 41% of civilian employees have decided to follow orders to “get the shot”, compared with 94% of uniformed members of the military.

Empirical evidence suggests that Black clergy, who, despite a common title, regardless of educational credentials, commonly refer to themselves as “doctor”, and within a demographic where the achievement gap in math and science is historically significant, are not the go to guys on health advice. And who can forget the alarm after Bishop Gerald Glenn decided to oppose social distancing, which at least science experts suggest was the cause of his tragic death, a debatable proposition currently before the judiciary in Virginia.

“Perhaps once the U.S. Marshals get a hold of my racketeering defendant Jimmy Kimmel, he can get some of his doctor friends to make another comical video like they did for vaccine absolutism, one right after the folks at UNC Chapel Hill had applied for a patent on the methodology to develop a SARS-like chimeric coronavirus spike protein, and another during our current pandemic. I’d be happy to deliver a few zingers about how, according to medical experts drinking an extreme amount of water in a short time can be dangerous and how even in water board practice we try to warn counterintelligence interrogators that imbibing too much of that life sustaining fluid too quickly can prompt a reduction in sodium levels below recommended levels and induce a condition of potentially life threatening hyponatremia, but if the good reverend says the church should blow off the science, at least we may never learn exactly how dangerous the one shot adenovirus regimen was, right?” quipped Major Mike Webb, the former biological warfare planner who had filed an injunction against the mRNA COVID-19 countermeasures at the beginning of December to compel the FDA that had blown off inspections of clinical trial sites to follow the science in a peer reviewed study published in August.

According to medical experts at VCU and VDH, the Black clergy, the last to return to in person worship, and practically the only places of worship that require proof of vaccination status, had begun meeting early in the public health crisis and quickly exhausted the topic that continues to baffle the scientists, moving on to other topics, during a year in which they began razing century old statues, marching in demonstrations and going door to door in a pandemic to pimp the one shot regimen from Janssen, early known to be associated with myocarditis.

Perhaps the new game plan is to dilute the damage caused by consuming what amounts to poison, but even after a night of intense alcohol consumption hydration tends not to reduce the damage, or cleanse a sin sick soul, washing sin’s stains white as winter snow.

One of the highlights of pandemic for one pesky litigation hobbyist was an interview with Rev. Mike Jones, by WRIC, a councilman who had taken up the cause of removing Confederate monuments, and who explained exactly what he didn't know about respiratory tract infections, infectious dose and a less than five percent secondary attack rate, positing that a person might turn their head 180 degrees like an owl to observe someone exhibiting an asymptomatic sign of infection, like sneezing. And at least one Alexandria pastor, Rev. Howard-John Wesley, the newly appointed Chairman of the UNCF National Faith and Education Initiative Advisory Council, and currently in mental health therapy and in recovery from a bout of “burnout”, bipolar disorder according to the DSM-V, told reporters at Religious News, “in our mind, one member contracting COVID on the grounds of Alfred Street would be more than we believe glorifies God.”

Our mind, like a collective effort, yet almost three years into a pandemic a faith team that has still failed to read the 40-page report prepared by the WHO in February 2020 that had determined, after reviewing 55,924 laboratory confirmed cases in China, by 1,800 teams of at least five epidemiologists who had assessed a secondary attack rate between 0.9% and 4.8% presenting in discrete clustered outbreaks with no wider community spread and primarily targeting farming families in the largest city in the central mainland that “it is not clear whether this correlates with the presence of an infectious virus.”

One reporter at Essence had expressed her woeful frustration in not being able to locate disaggregated data on racial impacts from COVID-19 that had been diligently compiled by Boston University and The Atlantic until just before the first anniversary of the pandemic and announcement of the American Rescue Plan that was to end the pandemic by Independence Day after the first celebration of a new imaginary holiday, by which time, apparently, over 73,000 Negroes had perished to a novel coronavirus. And while Blacks accounted for over 60% of the fatalities in Richmond, Mayor Levar Stoney was securing contracts for his donors to remove a statue of Robert E. Lee.

And in other Ebony News, Jennifer McClellan, the delegate who had vied to defeat Terry McCauliff for the gubernatorial nomination was elected as the nominee to succeed former Congressman Donald McEachin, who tragically died just weeks after winning reelection in November.

Like Rev. Calvin Butts, the former pastor of the historic Abyssinian Baptist Church in Harlem, who had organized Black clergy to vaccinate his people, and 80s star of Fame who had celebrated her birthday by getting the vaccine, posting her joy on Twitter, McEachin shall be sorely missed. McClellan had famously cried out in helpless despair after former Governor Ralph Northam had been infected, seeking his medical care from a fellow pediatrician to stave off a lethal and highly contagious disease, but proudly and apparently convincing voters his infection was proof his mask worked.

Northam, a medical doctor had suggested you could find protection with only a bandana, and even a piece of cloth secured in your face with a couple of rubber bands, but found some confusion attempting to explain aerosol transmission during his Labor Day COVID-19 update just before his infection.

Who managed to infect the former governor remains unknown, but he refused an invitation from one recipient of a letter from the Congregation for the Causes of Saints who had offered to lay healing hands on him, and hug and kiss him like apparently they do in the former Governor's church.

“What? God is everywhere and I've heard reports,” laughed the passionate son of a preacher man.

Note: grandiosity is a classic sign of bipolar disorder, and we don't want to hurt his feelings lest he go to “that place”, so familiar to Arlington Public School Board Member, Latina Cristina Torres-Diaz.

Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim-cherry. A pandemic agent as lucky can be. Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim--achoo. The luck'll rub off when I bump fists with you. Or blow me a kiss, and catch COVID-2.

Your elected representative is called your elected representative for a reason; and Martin Luther King and Jesus never got elected.

And let’s get ready to RUMBLE! https://rumble.com/vp2uk1-attorneys-need-not-apply-you-have-the-right-to-remain-silent.html.

For more on this topic, please call Major Mike Webb for Virginia at (802) HOT-RLTW, or email at GiveFaithATry@gmail.com.