Prince HARRY Asks The Godfather TO HELP WITH HIS BOOK (SPARE)

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Harry request the assistance of the Godfather - will he offer them his help, for deliver a few home truths? Let's see.

#HarryandMeghan #Harry #PrinceHarry #meghanmarkle #parody #royalinterview #meghan #satire #thesussexes #godfather #doncorelone #marlonbrando

Transcript:

H: I’m sure you’ve heard Godfather, I’ve got this new book coming out early next year.

G: Congratulations.

H: Don’t speak too soon Don Corelone, er, Godfather… you know what I’ve gone and done don’t you?

G: I still can’t get over the idea of you writing a book.

H: Writing is a strong word. Anyway, you know what I’ve gone a done, don’t you?

G: (Expression)

H: I’ve gone to town on people in the book. Really gone to town on them. Passively aggressively on the whole, but some times just full blown aggressively, it’s the only way we could get such an excellent contract.

G: What do you mean, “people”?

H: Oh come on, Godfather, where have you been, in a cave with your eyes closed and fingers in your ears for the last five years?

G: No, Harry, I just don’t find trials and tribulations of you and your lovely wife a subject worthy of interest.

H: Ooo, brutal.

G: (Slight laugh expression)

H: I’ve gone ard at my family, who happen to be royal.

G: So, why have you come to me; what is it I can do to help you?

H: I’m not sure you’re hearing me correctly Godfather; I’ve gone a said stuff that is going to cause shockwaves - I’m regretting it now

G : (expression)

H: (wearing shorn wig) I’m concerned that if this carries on I might start losing my hair.

G: It’s what happens in your forties.

H: I’m 38.

G: You still haven’t answered my question - how is it that I can help you?

H: Well, I’ve got an idea: I’ve been thinking this through with all of my brain power for days

G: It must be full proof.

H: I want you to ask your, whats the polite why of saying this, goons,

G: Probably one of the least polite.

H: Knuckle-head henchmen, whatever, the point is, I think it’s possible for you to get these, employees of yours, to seize every single copy, as they’re bought.

G: That’s err, next-level preposterous.

H: Oh, I’m glad you think so. It’ll be tough, don’t worry, but it can be done; it must be done!

G: Harry - what about online copies? What about newspapers?

H: Look, it’s going to be a big job, I don’t deny that.

G: Harry it’s impossible and I’m going to have to ask you to stop wasting my time

H: But…

G: No! Don’t speak! You whinged and moaned like a girly-man ever since I’ve known you

H: Racist

G: If you are so greedy for money that you’ll sell your intimate history, then you need to live with the consequences. I personally see nothing honourable in publicly documenting your endless complaining. You can never escape it now

H: That’s the problem.

G: You had months. Months to back out of this malicious journey, but you saddled up with supplies instead. Now you want to turn back

H: Yes, please Godfather, and only you can help me

G: The logistics of the idea itself, Harry, is a demonstration of the limitations of your mind - but even if it was possible, your request would go unfulfilled.

H: Oh, no fair!

G: Welcome to reality Harry. Fairness doesn’t come into it. Why are some people born with incurable illnesses, or in poverty, whilst some are born into privilege, as princes?

H: (Looks around little guiltily)

G: An unsavoury mixture of greed, stupidity and festering bitterness has compelled you down this road - without one of them, perhaps you would have seen sense and resisted the urge to go scorched earth

H: Well two of them are a given and I chose to be bitter

G: So live with the consequences; I must return to some pressing issues of my own, Fredo is causing me some problems.

H: Is he still angry he got sacked from CNN?

G: Furious. I thank you coming to my house and for the beautiful flowers you presented to my wife. You’ve always been an impeccably mannered guest

H: Time to face music then. Sayonara Godfather.

G: Clemenza, get me some aspirin, my head hurts