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Emotionally Unavailable Men - How To Spot Them In Time!
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Emotionally Unavailable Men - How To Spot Them In Time!
One of the most common problems a woman runs into within a relationship is emotionally unavailable men. These are guys that just don’t seem to BE THERE emotionally like she is.
Before we get started on the hot topic of unavailable guys, I have to point out something shocking that you might not know…
Women are often more emotionally open than men, sure. This much we know.
But women are also just as afraid of commitment on many levels as men are…!
Let me explain:
Guys are naturally hard-wired to contain and hide emotions.
A boy’s life is much more difficult if he’s overly expressive and sensitive
(I’m not saying this is right or wrong, it simply IS.) Boys are almost always rewarded by their peers for being more emotionally “unavailable.”
Meaning that for all the most important years he was growing up and developing his emotional IQ, he was given more positive reinforcement for hiding his feelings. Human beings instinctively pull back from men who express too many “gooey” emotions.
Think about it yourself: How happy are you in a relationship with a guy who doesn’t have at least a solid base of calmness and emotional control?
If you’re honest, you’ll admit that men who are too emotional are very unattractive.
Relationships With Emotionally Unavailable Guys – 7 Signs He’s Broken
As we discuss this, also keep in mind that women can be emotionally unavailable in many ways, too.
For Example: Most women do not have a good relationship to their own anger. This is something you may have experienced yourself.
So while men are often viewed as being unavailable more often, it’s something that happens with women as well.
Is There A Scientific Reason For Him Being Unavailable?
Yes, actually, there is a scientific reason for this. Hundreds of thousands of years ago, if a man was to survive in the hostile environment of fighting off predators, avoiding starvation, and ensuring the survival of his children, he couldn’t go mammoth hunting and cry on Groknak’s shoulder.
He had to:
- Deal with his feelings and manage them…
- Which usually means stuffing them deep down and out of the way…
- Pay attention to the present-moment challenges of survival…
- Ignore his feelings for his family to focus on the immediate needs of his tribe…
- And he really didn’t have a lot of TIME to dwell on his feelings. Every day was a fight to survive in harsh conditions. His relationships were from necessity…
We are fortunate now to live in a time where we have the luxury of exploring our inner emotional experience in a relationship much more than our friendly caveman Groknak could.
Your experience of emotions also benefits you much more than a guy:
Women are naturally wired to express their emotions openly…
Women also experience a more varied emotional range than most men do. You have more emotional ups and downs than a guy typically does…
Women will use their emotional conversations as a way to bond and share information with each other (sometimes referred to inaccurately as “gossip”)
So there are a lot of historical reasons for a man’s behavior. Fortunately for us, things are starting to change. Men are becoming more emotionally communicative on the whole.
DID YOU KNOW: Men also have “emotional cycles” – similar to a woman’s cycle…?
You need to know what the signs are for emotionally unavailable men – and be able to spot them. I’m going to explain a little about each signal as we go through them, and give you more detail.
Keep in mind that being an emotionally unavailable man is not always the same as
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Carlos Cavallo
Dating Advice Guru
http://www.datingadviceguru.com
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Emotionally Unavailable Men
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