Symposium on Meaning & Marriage | S13 part 2 | Meaning Conference 2002

Symposium on Meaning & Marriage 10 a.m. – 11:50 a.m.

Chair – Judy Toronchuk, Ph.D., Trinity Western University
S13 Khawla Abu Baker, PhD, Lecturer in Emek Yezreel College, Israel. Departement of Behavioral Science; Director of “Mar’ah” Institute for Arab Women Studies

The meaning of tight-lipped Arab women in marital problems

Marriage in the Arab society is still a family procedure. As a result of centuries of Moslem religious rules and gendered seclusion, Arab societies developed two systems of social norms, one for each gender. Men have to financially support women and children, make all life decisions, order women to serve them and to be compliant to them. They are obliged to learn to lead their families, communities and society. Women, on the other hand, are brought up to be shy, modest, hesitant, serve others, altruist, compliant to men and voiceless. One of the main norms, Arab culture encourage in marital life is the “Sutra” or the tight-lipped women who is called “Mastura” and wins a high respect from her surrounding. Adopting the “Mastura” psychological state means that Arab woman should keep silent, never criticize her husband in person or in public, never blame him for his deeds, never share her pain with relatives and friends, and never describe her husband’s bad manners to others.
This group of women who imposed on themselves total reticent usually suffer from psychosomatic problems, depression, aggression against their children, nervous break down and marital cut-off. Therapy should be able to offer a meaning for the discreet of pain for years, and a meaning for the legitimate share of the pain while in therapy. A case study of clinical work with a teacher who was married for 23 years, who suffered from chronic depression as a result of silencing her voice, will be presented to highlight the main cultural principles in this mater, their reflection on the psychological state of silent women and ways which cultural sensitive therapy may be applied in such cases.

Educational Objectives: 1) To understand the gendered differential meaning of marriage in Arab society. 2) To develop cultural sensitivity when utilizing western approaches and theories in mental health therapy with non-western clients. 3) To give an example of the need to understand the anthropology of feelings related to each culture.

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